No one wants to see any harm come to film reviewer Erik Henriksen... especially me. (Heh.. heh... hehhhhhh.) However, while he made a very coy and quick mention of it earlier, I want to make sure that every Tolkien nerd in America reads the following paragraph from Henriksen's review of Peter Jackson's The Hobbit in this week's issue.
Peter Jackson's The Hobbit is something else: Hollow, meandering, and tedious, it covers only the first part of Tolkien's book, yet somehow feels longer than any of Jackson's excellent Lord of the Rings films. Rings pared down a long story to its best parts, but the bloated Hobbit desperately grasps for more. To stretch The Hobbit into three movies, Jackson—and co-writers Fran Walsh, Philippa Boyens, and Guillermo del Toro—have shoehorned in material from Tolkien's notes, plus some stuff they invented for shits and giggles. (When George Lucas made the first film in another prequel trilogy, he too realized he had to pack his story with filler. "I know I'm going to need to use Hamburger Helper to get it to two hours," he said, "but that's what I want to do." Welcome to The Hobbit: Hamburger Helper.)
Read it all here, and... ATTACK MY NERDLINGS (and Hamburger Helper fans)! ATTAAAAAACK!!