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Local Escort Dishes on the Best Job She's Ever Had

Most people don't even know what happens when you call an escort, much less what it's like to be one. We asked Greta, who's been a full-service escort for over three years, to give us the rundown on her job. Which, by the way, she loves.

So what exactly do you do?

What "full service" means is very different for different people. At some agencies, it means a woman will come in and do a hand job or sit there and watch. What I do is a little bit more involved. I don't actually have sex with people, but I do have more contact. I'm naked, and they can touch me, but we don't actually have intercourse, and I don't do any kind of oral sex. I always hear that other people do, but I can't speak to that because I don't. Most men have fantasies and role-plays they want, and we'll indulge in them. I'd say 75% of the men I see have fantasies already ready.

What sorts of fantasies?

One of the main things is they want to be spanked. A lot of men are really into humiliation, which is something I do. There are the typical nurse fantasies, and I have two separate regular clients that have babysitter fantasies. One's more about me being the babysitter for the family, and the other one wants me to be his babysitter. I think men want to relinquish control with escorts, and be put in their place. It's been really interesting, because there seems to be a lot of guilt in other areas of their lives. Some of them are married, and feel like they can't be monogamous. They give into that, and then they want to be punished.

Also, a lot of the men I see have erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation issues, and are really uncomfortable around women. I've actually started to post on Craig's List as a sexual surrogate, dealing with men with sexual issues using breathing and Tantric principles. I've been getting like 75 emails a day from men who need help. I constantly have men who have premature ejaculation issues and are humiliated to tell me about it. I have to tell them that they are not alone. There are so many of them…--so many.

Sounds like you take a very therapeutic approach to it.

I do, and so often it really is about men who are uncomfortable sexually. I have this one man I see who's a fireman and was injured. It's very difficult for him to get an erection, and he really has no sex life outside of seeing me. We spend a lot of time just helping him get there, basically. And it does feel good to be able to do that for him. I don't do anything that's just about using my body or treating me like a body. All the men I see respect me and are very grateful. I think it's important that people know that men who call escorts aren't just creepy pervs. In reality that's just a handful, and personally, I don't deal with them. But mostly it's just men who are lonely, have problems, or need something different from the traditional dating scene to be comfortable sexually, and they're working on it with me. It's not just a bunch of lecherous men preying on women.

You work independently, and do outcall only. How do you keep yourself safe?

At least 50 percent of my clients I see in their homes, and otherwise it's usually a hotel. I have someone who comes with me and she sits in the car. When I get in there I tell the client I have someone who's going to call in five minutes and that this person's close by. (I usually say "he," but it's actually my friend.) And that "he'll" be calling sometime randomly, and I have to answer the phone or someone will be coming to the door. I feel pretty safe. I've had only one experience out of so many that was frightening.

Yuck, what happened?

I walked into this place, and as soon as I got in, the guy ran around behind me and shut the door and was immediately very nasty, like "Get down on the ground!" I said, "I'm feeling very uncomfortable already--I'm not sure this is going to work out." And then he said, "I'm not paying you to be comfortable." So I just sort of opened the door behind me and bolted. It was really scary, and I didn't go anywhere for a week, and then I had to decide if I even still wanted to do it. But I have intuition about it now. The ones who are really vulgar on the phone I don't see, just because it's disrespectful, and also telling.

How did you get into this?

I used to live in New Orleans, and I was a cocktail waitress at an orgy bar. I got to know all of these wonderful drag queens and people who were doing this kind of work. I've always been a very sexual woman, and knew it was something I could do. Also, from the very beginning I felt like it was a good thing to do. I know a lot of people don't, and are very judgmental about it.

How much does it cost to see you?

Two-hundred dollars for an hour. It's pretty good money. That's all I'm doing right now. It's actually really cool, I work about 10 hours a month.

How would you rate this job compared to others you've had?

I think it's the best. It's hard work obviously, there's no denying that. But it's an hour, it goes by really fast, and it's fun.

Plus you can just turn off your phone.

Yeah, there are plenty of times I don't answer the phone. It's totally up to me. I choose when I work and I choose when I go on vacation--which is a lot.

What sort of qualities would make someone a good candidate for this line of work?

You have to be very open-minded sexually. You can't be someone who's freaked out by people's fetishes or fantasies, or you'll just wind up offending someone--or offending yourself, not being true to yourself. Also, you have to be pretty smart.

Are you open about what you do? Do you have to defend your occupation all the time?

I used to, and I'm pretty open about it. But people just have to accept that this is what I do and I'm comfortable with it. That's what counts. But I do feel the need for some anonymity. I mean it would be impossible--impossible--to explain it to my little brother. And it's not like if I'm out to dinner I want everyone at the table to know what I do and how great I think it is, because I don't want that to define me: "That's the escort."

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