HEY, amateur or professional artists! Would you like to see your work published on the cover of the Portland Mercury AND win a cool $100? Then read on!

Recently a former Christian pastor gained national attention after claiming that Starbucks removed "Christmas from their cups because they hate Jesus." (Starbucks says they actually removed reindeers and ornaments from their cups to be more inclusive of other religions.) This action drove certain Christians to the brink of insanity, proclaiming that the decision was just another shot in the continuing "War Against Christmas."

Well, it's time to correct this obvious wrong, and GIVE CHRISTIANS THE STARBUCKS CUP THEY DESERVE! On our cover this week we've published a blank Starbucks cup coloring page, and we want YOU to design and color it with a "Christian/Christmas" theme. Because if we don't give them the cup they want? These Christians will never fucking shut up. HERE ARE THE RULES:

• Use any media you want (paint, markers, crayons, pens, collage, etc.) as long as it can be scanned or delivered via mail.

• It must have a "Christian/Christmas" theme. (No overtly profane words or images, please!)

• You can use this week's cover, or download a clean version HERE.

• Specifications: Your art must be at least 9" wide x 10" tall (the space inside the dotted line), or if sending via email, scan it as a 300 dpi jpg.

• Include your contact info (name, email, daytime phone) and either email a high-res image to cupcontest@portlandmercury.com or via snail mail to "Cup Coloring Contest" c/o Portland Mercury, 115 SW Ash, Ste. 600, Portland, OR 97204. (Mail it flat, and mark it "fragile," grandpa!)

• DEADLINE IS 5 PM, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 10, 2015.

All entries will be fairly judged by a local unbiased expert (probably an atheist barista from Peet's Coffee), and the winner will have their artwork grace more than 40,000 copies of the Portland Mercury on December 23, AND win $100!

So HURRY! Get Your Art Supplies and Enter the Mercury's "Design a Christian Starbucks Cup" Coloring Contest... because, obviously, Christians have nothing more important to worry about!