Parties Aplenty

CC SLAUGHTERS BLOCK PARTY FOR AUTISTIC KIDS: What goes together better than a gay club, a block party, a dance music diva, booze, and autistic kids? I know, you're stumped. Check out the CC Slaughters annual dance party in the street, this year starring Kristine W, whose dance record Stronger tore up the scene in 2000. All proceeds go to autistic kids plus, it's a great excuse to squeeze your ass into those tiny leather pants.

Saturday, August 16, NW Davis between 2nd & 3rd, 6 pm-2 am, $5 suggested donation

FOSTER SIDEWALK CELEBRATION: It's a hung jury. Is Foster Road radical, or totally lame? Personally, I don't care, because the sister duo the Black Peppercorns will be playing, and a young female group called Daisy and the Flower Children will be doing a punk interpretation of the classic opera, Carmen. It boggles the mind.

Saturday, August 16, 5115 SE Foster, 6-9 pm, free

INTERSTATE BLOCK PARTY: Do some garage sale rummaging while checking out belly dancing, plus the insane acrobatics of traditional Brazilian dancers Grupo Condor. Kids, grandmas, and spendthrifts welcome.

Sat-Sun, 9 am-5 pm, 5340 N Interstate, 823-4322, free

Pussies Begone!

Baseball players nowadays are soft, with their endorsement deals, and their steroids... and their gloves. Back in 1860, baseball players didn't have any money, "high-performance drugs" consisted of opium and a fifth of scotch, and only the pussiest of pussies even considered using a glove.

To celebrate those rugged 19th-century sluggers, the Vancouver National Historic Reserve has organized an 1860s Historical Baseball Game, in which all the old rules apply. The pitcher has to throw the ball underhanded; a ball caught on the fly is an out (normal), and a ball caught on the first bounce is also an out (abnormal); and of course no gloves are allowed. Ever seen someone try to catch a screaming line drive hardball barehanded? Probably not, and there's a reason for that, as you will find out today.

The teams at this game will consist of soldiers from the 1st Oregon Volunteer Infantry and members of the Vancouver Occidentals Baseball Club, a longstanding rivalry that could result in some good brawlin'. So bring a blanket, bring a little picnic, bring the peanuts, and settle back for a rousing round of baseball the way it was meant to be played--without pussies! JUSTIN WESCOAT SANDERS

Vancouver Barracks, From I-5, take the Mill Plain exit and head east. Turn south onto Fort Vancouver Way. At the traffic circle, go east on Evergreen Boulevard and follow signs to the Fort Vancouver, (360) 696-7655, Saturday, August 16, 6 pm, free

Hogs & Bulls

Here's a tip for anyone planning an event in Portland: Would you like a large write-up in the Portland Mercury devoted to your upcoming event? Then get a MECHANICAL BULL. Nothing and I mean NOTHING gets our attention like a mechanical bull. We don't care if you're putting on the "Nazi Party Baby Drowning Jamboree." If you have a mechanical bull, you're guaranteed a mention, and we'll be there with spurs on.

That being said, the following event would be mentioned with or without a mechanical bull. It's the Rose City Thunder: Harley-Davidson 100th Anniversary. Thousands of Harley enthusiasts are making the pilgrimage to Milwaukee, WI to celebrate Harley's 100th birthday--but the Northwest contingent is stopping off for two days of partying in Portland! The South Park Blocks will literally teem with throbbing hogs, and the hirsute people who love them. Plus there's gonna be live music (Curtis Salgado Band on Sunday at 5:30 pm), food, tricked-out choppers, antique bikes, and let's see I'm sure I've forgotten something oh, yeah. A MECHANICAL BULL, which everyone agrees is the one Texas invention that almost makes up for George W. Bush. WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY

Rose City Thunder Harley Rally, SW Park, SW Salmon and SW Market, 823-7529, Saturday 5 pm-10 pm, and Sunday 12 pm-7 pm, Aug 16 and 17.

Get Ready To Rumble

once Again, that a-hole Bush has decided to poke the injured tiger with a stick and show his monkey face in Portland. So let's give him a Rose City welcome. Join activists in their pre-protest protesting and other spirit-rallying activities before the big action on Thursday, August 21 at PSU.

•See video footage from the last Bush demonstration and take a workshop about documenting police misconduct at protests. Thursday, Red & Black, 2138 SE Division, 7 pm, $3

•Join Portland Peaceful Response Coalition's ongoing rallies, re-christened the first of the "Five Days Of Fury." Friday, Pioneer Square, 5 pm

•The Defeat Bush Now campaign is holding conferences that provide information and workshops on giving rich boy the old heave-ho. Saturday, 2 pm, PSU Smith Center Ballroom, by donation

•Join the stalwarts at the peace camp for their weekly potluck (and bring something good!). Sunday, 5 pm, Terry Schrunk Plaza, SW 4th & Jefferson, by donation

•Take in a collection of short films on Bush's various incompetencies, entitled (P)resident Evil: The Night Before Bush Video Screening. Tuesday, 7 pm, The Know, 2026 NE Alberta, $1-5 donation

•Bring a guitar and sleeping bag to the peace camp's sign-making party, and wake up with allies. Wednesday, 8 pm, Terry Schrunk Plaza MARJORIE SKINNER