Trashmouth Comedy Night

Sure, Portland is home to any number of talented indie bands. But did you know it has also become a mecca for brash, high-quality, and dirty-mouthed standup comics?

On Saturday, Sabala's gathers up some of the most talented of these local comics--and not just lameass Seinfelds, either. These comics climb right into your face, and none more so than Lonnie Bruhn, who suffers from cerebral palsy and turns his ailment into part of the act. Seriously dark and twisted, Bruhn's comedy is a murky mixture of meanness, perversion, and self-deprecation; but, above all, he is infectious. At the age of 19, Bruhn was the youngest comic to ever win Portland's Laugh Off.

Joining him on stage is Susanna Lee, who does for bad attitude what Rodney Dangerfield did for low self-esteem. Although a fresh-faced girl from Kansas City, she has a filthy, filthy mouth and a demeanor as smooth as barbed wire. No one will escape her ripping scrutiny as she pokes fun at the smugly cool hipsters as well as the laidback hippies. Get ready to laugh, and become the object of hilarious mockery! PHIL BUSSE

Trashmouth Comedy Night also with Joe Fontineau, Sabala's at Mt. Tabor, 4811 SE Hawthorne, Saturday, July 16, 9 pm, $8

Harry Potter Six!

EEEEEEE! EEEEEEE! HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE IS ALMOST HERE!

You're screaming with excitement, right? You've re-read books one through five, right? You used a razor blade to carve a lighting bolt-shaped scar across your forehead, RIGHT? IT'S ALMOST HERE!

The midnight release of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince is Friday night, and Powell's will have parties at all of their locations, with their downtown store transforming NW Couch into "Diagon Alley." Reading Frenzy's hosting an 18+ "Punks Heart Potter!" event, while Wiccan store Another Moon presents divination classes and, creepily, a "write-your-own-fan-fiction" corner where you can predict Harry's Half-Blood Prince exploits. (Harry and Luna Lovegood are SO GOING TO HOOK UP!) Even Barnes & Noble and Borders are getting into the act--all so you can get your very own copy of the 672-page Half-Blood Prince at 12:01 am! ERIK HENRIKSEN

Powell's Books on Burnside, 1005 W Burnside, starts at 8pm, and Powell's on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne; Reading Frenzy, 921 SW Oak, 9 pm-1 am; Another Moon, 729 E. Burnside, 9pm-2am; Barnes & Noble Lloyd Center, 1317 Lloyd Center, 249-0800, 6 pm-1:30 am; Borders Portland, 708 SW 3rd, 220-5911, 9pm-1 am. Pre-ordering your copy of Half-Blood Prince is recommended by all stores except Powell's and Borders.