Dicks on Wheels 

What is wrong with you? Not every woman who waits at a bus stop or walks down the street is a whore. I wasn't even born a woman! Catch a clue, dudes. I have nice breasts, but I also have a penis in my panties. I'm in my 40s! Are you REALLY that desperate? Real whores dress in jeans or sweats and are either grossly obese or anorexic from drug use. If you see a sexily dressed, healthy-looking woman on the street, she's probably a cop.

Going around the block once for a better look is a compliment... twice is creepy... the third time is just scary. It's stalking, and there are laws against that.

Today I wrote down the license number, model, and make of every car that stalked me--including the asshole in the green pick-up who followed me home. In just over two hours I ended up with a list of 10!

You'd better pray nothing bad happens to me, cause the police are going to find that list... and then you can explain to your wives and employers why you are a person of interest in a sex crime.--Anonymous

Read more I, Anonymous here

To submit your own rant, rave or confession, email anonymous@portlandmercury.com

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