Film Shorts 

The Ultimate Film Fanatic Challenge
Your last chance to show what an insufferable movie geek you are. Blue Moon

22nd Annual Reel Music Festival
For more info, hit www.nwfilm.org.

Arvo P...rt: 24 Preludes for a Fugue
A documentary about composer Arvo P...rt. Guild Theater

Big City Dick
This film's supposedly about street performer Richard Peterson, but what do you want to bet that's just what the Northwest Film Center's telling people so they can get away with showing a gay porn? Guild Theater

Desperate Man Blues & Loser's Club
Desperate Man Blues is about record collector Joe Bussard; Loser's Club follows Portland guitarists Jim Mesi and Steve Bradley. Guild Theater

Queen of the Gypsies: A Portrait of Carmen Amaya
A documentary about Carmen Amaya, flamenco dancer extraordinaire. Guild Theater

Santo Domingo Blues
Finally! How long have we been waiting for a film about the guitar blues music of the Dominican Republic?! Rejoice, friends! The wait is over! Guild Theater

Why Vivaldi? & The Man with an Opera House in His Living Room
Why Vivaldi? asks why people still like the composer; Opera House documents a crazy bastard in the middle of the English countryside who demands on mounting a Mozart opera in his living room. (His neighbors, predictably enough, hate him.) Whitsell Auditorium

Jewish Film Festival

For more info, hit www.nwfilm.org.

Arna's Children
The son of a West Bank drama teacher returns to learn what has become of her students. (Let's just say that the teacher might as well have been teaching Suicide Bombing 101.) Whitsell Auditorium

Nina's Tragedies
A 14-year-old boy deals with his parents' divorce, his newly Orthodox father, and his aunt... whom he secretly LOVES! Whitsell Auditorium

Walk on Water
The relationship between Israel and Germany--which, shockingly, isn't all buddy-buddy--is explored in this road movie/thriller. Whitsell Auditorium

* Alien
Ridley Scott's masterpiece of fear in outer space. If you'd never seen it on the big screen, don't miss this opportunity. (Anthony D. Davis) Fifth Avenue Cinemas

Alien vs. Predator
Quite possibly the worst idea in the history of film. (Erik Henriksen) Fifth Avenue Cinemas

Alone in the Dark
Has-been Christian Slater stars with never-been Tara Reid in this adaptation of the Atari videogame. Watch for our film short next week. Regal Cinemas, etc.

Are We There Yet?
Yes, that is Ice Cube wrestling with a child for a juice box. Yes, that is Ice Cube fighting with a deer. Yes, that is Ice Cube being a sad, sappy sucker. (Zac Pennington) Regal Cinemas, etc.

The Assassination of Richard Nixon
Assassination attempts to explore the events of a man's (Sean Penn) life that led him to hold up a plane at gunpoint with the intention of flying it into the White House and killing Nixon. But Penn's social ineptitude seems inherent, not instilled by a fucked-up world, as director Niels Mueller would have us believe; Bicke's final act is thus not the chilling product of a society we are all a part of, but merely the meaningless deed of an unhinged soul. (Justin Sanders) City Center 12, Fox Tower 10

Assault on Precinct 13
While the once-awesome John Carpenter hasn't made anything worthwhile since 1986, at least director Jean-François Rchet and screenwriter James DeMonaco do a decent job remaking his little-seen 1976 Assault. (Erik Henriksen) Regal Cinemas, etc.

* Bad Education
If Hitchcock's Vertigo collided head-on with a drag queen variety show, the brilliant wreckage would be Pedro Almodovar's Bad Education. (Ryan Dirks) Fox Tower 10

Baked Alaska & Rising Waters
Two films about global climate change. Selections of the Heart of the Earth Environmental Film Series; brace yourself for the reek of patchouli. First Unitarian Church

Detour
Sexy Ann Savage offers hitchiker Tom Neal a ride in this stylish 1945 drama. Old Town Pizza

A Farewell to Arms
Gary Cooper does the Hemingway thing. Cafe Nola

Father and Son
A father and a son in Russia deal with their shifting family dynamic and love for one another. Whitsell Auditorium

* Footloose
The start of the Mercury's Winter Prozac Film Fest! See Destination Fun on page 11. Clinton Street Theater

Guerilla: The Taking of Patty Hearst See review this issue. Cinema 21

Hide and Seek See review this issue. Regal Cinemas, etc.

Indigo
This bullshit just has to be a trick to get you into a New Age cult: Indigo, a film that examines "the extraordinary number of children being born with apparently advanced consciousness and abilities." Celebration Church, Thunderbird Hotel, Valley Theater

Inside Iraq: The Untold Stories
Despite Inside Iraq's focus on the aftermath of the U.S.'s actions, director Mike Shiley largely settles for documenting only the rosiest aspects of America's influence. (Erik Henriksen) Cafe Nola, Laurelhurst

Kicking Bird
Director Kelley Baker's film about a white trash kid who can run faster than anybody else on his high school team. Hollywood Theatre

A Love Song for Bobby Long See review this issue. Broadway Metroplex, Century Eastport 16, Westgate

* The Magnificent Seven
See My, What A Busy Week! page 13. Whitsell Auditorium

* Million Dollar Baby See review this issue. Regal Cinemas, etc.

* Minority Report
Complex in good ways, simple in others, the film marks Spielberg's second attempt at allegorical Kubrick paean that ends with a cop-out. Still, a worthy effort, and much more intriguing than most sci-fi. (Sean Nelson) Blind Onion

Play It Again, Sam
Woody Allen. Diane Keaton. You know the drill. Laurelhurst

Rabbit-Proof Fence
The true tale of Molly, a 14-year-old Aborigine, her sister, and their cousin. Part of the Stolen Generation, they were forcibly seized and placed in a racial assimilation compound. Their escape and journey back home is heroic, but the impassive representation of it undermines a fulfilling sense of sympathy. (Marjorie Skinner)

PSU Smith Memorial Union

* Raiders of the Lost Ark & Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
As awesome of a double feature as this is, it pretty much begs the question: Where the fuck is Temple of Doom!? Chance of Rain Cafe

* Sex Is Comedy See review this issue. Cinema 21

A Tree of Palme See review this issue. Clinton Street Theater

A Very Long Engagement
Directed by Amélie's Jean-Pierre Jeunet and starring Amélie's Audrey Tautou, which is pretty much all you need to know. (Erik Henriksen) City Center 12, Fox Tower 10

White Noise
Poor Michael Keaton. (Erik Henriksen) Regal Cinemas, etc.

* The Woodsman
Just released from prison, where he served 12 years as a sex offender, Walter (Kevin Bacon) sincerely struggles to reform and lead a normal life. The Woodsman is commendably brave, exploring both the demons and the kindnesses in Walter. (Marjorie Skinner) Hollywood Theatre

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