Film Shorts 

In Which We Hit It and Quit It

HECKLEVISION: POINT BREAK 100 percent pure adrenaline.

HECKLEVISION: POINT BREAK 100 percent pure adrenaline.

recommended The Avengers
Vengeance is a dish best served by the Avengers. ERIK HENRIKSEN Various Theaters.

Battleship
Battleship is a movie for adults that's based on a children's game. So it's basically indefensible, both as a thing that our culture produced and as an actual piece of entertainment—though it's not the last such movie we'll see, as Hollywood is ever-adept at transforming creative bankruptcy into depressingly high box-office numbers. (Stay tuned for Connect Four: Tantric Misadventures; an Eli Roth-directed Operation; and the self-explanatory Pickup Sticks: The Musical.) If you are a grownup who likes to see things go boom, you will probably see this movie, and afterward you will feel terrible about yourself and how you choose to spend your money. Actually, first you will read this review, and be all, "Man, this reviewer hates fun!" And then you will see the movie and the self-loathing will commence, tenfold. ALISON HALLETT Various Theaters.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel
A comedic drama about a group of retirees who move to a dilapidated hotel in India, starring the worship-worthy British biddies Dame Judi Dench and Queen Bitch Maggie Smith. Various Theaters.

recommended Castles in the Sky: Miyazaki, Takahata, and the Masters of Studio Ghibli
An excellent selection of some of the best films from Hayao Miyazaki and Studio Ghibli. This week's films include Pom Poko, Spirited Away, Whisper of the Heart, and Howl's Moving Castle. For more info, see nwfilm.org and "When Totoros Attack," Film, May 3. Northwest Film Center's Whitsell Auditrium.

Chernobyl Diaries
See review this issue. Various Theaters.

Chinese Take-Away
In which an antisocial man in Buenos Aires meets up with a lost young man from China, at which point—surprise!—"a man's precious, decades-old misanthropy undergoes a seriously comic siege." Living Room Theaters.

The City Dark
A documentary about light pollution, featuring "a cast of eclectic scientists, philosophers, historians, and lighting designers." Clinton Street Theater.

Experimental Film Festival Portland
A new experimental film fest featuring 85 films by creators both international and local. In addition to screenings around the city, there will be performance and installation works, afterparties, and meet and greets. See "Weird Rumblings," Film, May 17, for more info; see effportland.com for schedule and venues. Various Locations.

recommended First Position
See review this issue. Cinema 21.

God Bless America
Within the first 10 mintues of Bobcat Goldthwait's new dark comedy, the main character shoots an infant point blank, showering its screaming mother's face in blood. It's just a fantasy, though—that of Frank (Joel Murray), a disgruntled, lonely man whose nightly channel surfing has rendered him so disgusted with American culture that he's only a few breaking points away from murderous rampage. The next thing we know, Frank's on the road with Roxy (Tara Lynne Barr), his improbable teenage sidekick, gleefully murdering anyone that they find rude, stupid, or cruel. While it's intended to be a liberal's catharsis, God Bless America follows an unsurprising formula. It's basically one long joke borne out across the length of a feature, and it's neither smart nor nuanced enough to carry the air of superiority it hinges on. MARJORIE SKINNER Hollywood Theatre.

Great NW Film Tour
A new, McMenamins-based film series aiming to give "new films a place to be shown, gather momentum, and burst out onto the scene." First up: Adventures in Plymptoons!, a documentary about Portland animator Bill Plympton. Events on Saturday, May 26, coincide with Portland's recently declared Bill Plympton Day. More info: mcmenamins.com. Bagdad Theater, St. Johns Theater and Pub.

recommended Headhunters
A very good Norwegian thriller starring Aksel Hennie and Game of Thrones' Nikolaj Coster-Waldau. The action is consistently deft and darkly humorous, bringing to mind the Coen brothers at their leanest, darkest, and Blood Simple-est. NED LANNAMANN Hollywood Theatre, Living Room Theaters.

recommended Hecklevision: Point Break
Swayze. Reeves. Busey. Surfing. Football. Skydiving. Guns. Sex. Your texts. 100 PERCENT PURE ADRENALINE. More info here; tickets here. Hollywood Theatre.

recommended Hit So Hard
See review this issue. Hollywood Theatre.

Men in Black 3
See review this issue. Various Theaters.

recommended Rerun Theater
See My, What a Busy Week! Hollywood Theatre.

Runaway & Looker
The PSU Film Department presents an '80s-tastic, Michael Crichton sci-fi double feature. Looker stars Albert Finney, but all you really need to know is that Runaway features Tom Selleck versus Gene Simmons' killer robots. Hollywood Theatre.

recommended Saving Private Ryan
"That boy is alive. We are gonna send somebody to find him." Hollywood Theatre.

recommended Sometimes a Great Notion
See My, What a Busy Week! Hollywood Theatre.

Sprung! A Bike Smut Retrospective
A weekly, Bike Smut-curated retrospective of films that have "influenced or paved the way for our festival." Each screening will be accompanied by "shorts, performances, trivia, games, and prizes." Clinton Street Theater.

recommended Squirm
See My, What a Busy Week! Hollywood Theatre.

Ten
Abbas Kiarostami's 2002 film, a drama "as seen through the eyes of one woman as she drives throughout he streets of Tehran." Fifth Avenue Cinema.

Trannysnatchers
There's something charming about Trannysnatchers—I mean, it's a locally made B-movie nightmare about murderous satanic transvestite vigilantes who live in a shack, kidnapping their enemies and trying to raise a demon to bring about the end of gender duality. The production quality never leaves high-school AV club, but the dialogue that's audible is funny and clever and many of the characters are surprisingly endearing. (That said, when they're dressing down the penitent Christian, you can go for popcorn; it's seat-squirmingly awkward and goes on far too long.) SUZETTE SMITH Clinton Street Theater.

What to Expect When You're Expecting
What to Expect When You're Expecting isn't dumb because I hate pregnancy or women who want to have babies. And really, it could've been worse. But the I-can't-believe-this-is-a-genre genre of nonfiction-self-help-book-turned-clunky-multi-story-romcom sucks. So. You'll get what you expect. ELINOR JONES Various Theaters.

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