NOW YOU SEE ME Breaking into Amanda Bynes’ apartment turned out to be a really, really bad idea.

STUDIO EXECUTIVE 1: Let's make an Ocean's Eleven ripoff!

STUDIO EXECUTIVE 2: Okay.

SE1: Or maybe Ocean's Twelve? Which one had holograms?

SE2: Ocean's Twelve!

SE2: Then definitely that one! Okay, let's get Mark Zuckerberg and Haymitch and a Franco brother and a hot girl to be badass con-men.

SE2: WHAT?!?!?! Yes, please! The only thing that idea is missing is Morgan Freeman! And... magic tricks?

SE1: Whoa, yeah, let's put Morgan Freeman in it! And sure, magic, okay whatever. Wait... maybe they can steal stuff with magic? Then maybe... the Hulk tries to stop them?

SE2: Oh, shit yes! Wait. Can we add Batman's butler? I like Batman's butler.

SE1: Sure! Okay. So we've got Batman's butler, lots of cash, an insane car chase, cleavage, glitter, some holograms, flashy lights, and also spinning cameras.

SE2: Spinning cameras are a heist movie must!

SE1: This movie is going to be so awesome. I think it'll be better than Ocean's Twelve! Ocean's Twelve didn't even make any goddamn sense!

SE2: Yeah, we'll make it so this movie totally makes sense. We'll explain everything thoroughly so the audience gets it all. Like, extremely thoroughly. We can go easy on the action, in fact, for the sake of a very, very clear—some might even say obvious—plot.

SE1: Totally.

SE2: We want to be smart, but not too smart. Or, really, at all smart.

SE1: Okay, so—get this—the magic gets explained, but then... maybe... there's also—get this—real magic?

SE2: You just blew my fucking mind, man!

SE1: Think it'll be good?

SE2: Uh...

BOTH: WHATEVER!

~ fin ~