Dear Music Store Guy—I asked you if you had any left-handed guitars, to which you responded, "Yeah, we keep them with the left-handed drums and the left-handed pianos." You then proceeded to tell me that left-handed people just play right-handed like everyone else, and you said this with an attitude that almost seemed to imply that you think being left-handed is "all in my head." For the record, I learned to play guitar right-handed, and it never felt comfortable, so I switched to a lefty guitar, which made a world of difference. Also, I forgot to mention something while I was there: Jimi Hendrix? Kurt Cobain? Oh, and then you made some little joke about how I should go get one at the "Leftorium," and when I made a quip going along with your dumb joke you felt the need to explain to me that it's from The Simpsons, like I'm some idiot. I'm fucking left-handed, do you really think I've never heard of Flanders' Leftorium? It's okay, I know you are just jealous because left-handed people are more creative, and better in bed.-Anonymous
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