Illustration by Kalah Allen

Dear Jurors—Guilty? Seriously? You want the state to spend money each day for the next several years to lock up and/or monitor my dumbass client because he had a few baggies of pot and a scale and the state said that he "planned" to sell it to some other potheads at some unspecified point in the future? You didn't even think about the costs of your decision, did you? Show some fucking guts and acquit every time, in every drug case. And don't try to justify your verdict with some stupid "I'm just following the law" bullshit. Unjust laws should not be supported, respected, or condoned by a jury. And all arguments about cognitive liberty and the moral reasons to end prohibition aside, this type of crime and punishment just doesn't make financial sense for you and your community. I hope you feel good about your decision when the budget crisis really hits and your kids' schools scale back and the government spends your kids' teachers' salary to give three squares a day to this non-violent drug "dealer." Acquit. In every drug case. Seriously, don't be a jackass.—Anonymous