Kalah Allen

Question to all the people bemoaning the "death" of Portland: If all of the music venues and awesome-back-in-your-20s bars that are no longer here were still kicking, do you really think they would be catering to the same crowd, and would it be appropriate for you to hang out there? Would you be that weird aging guy/girl trying to be cool and fit in with the younger crowd, wearing your two-sizes-too-small Pixies t-shirt, awkwardly trying to relive your past? Would you really be nestling in with early 20-somethings? If the answer is "yes," you have some significant failure-to-launch issues. Everyone's youth and good old days "die" when you get older. Let's stop being ridiculous and complaining to no end about the "death" of Portland, as if it were possible for it to somehow stay an insulated bubble free from the effects of change.—Anonymous