Kalah Allen

To all you assholes at concerts who stand at the back of the room and blabber away: high five! At least you’re not as bad as the jackasses who stand at the front of the room and do it. Back or front, I just wish you’d all shut the fuck up! Who taught you it was okay to talk over live music? You don’t talk over live theater. You don’t talk over poetry readings. God forbid you talk in the movie theater. (I fucking hate those people.) So why do you talk over the bands that work super hard in this town and barely get paid? (Here, I’ll answer for you trolls: “’Cause your band sucks, brah!”) Do you tip the bands you go see? Doubt it! Did you buy an album? Doubt it! Did you spend $20 on drinks and tip the fuck out of the hottie bartender? Definitely. Well then, the least you could do is shut your fucking yapper while someone is performing an art that is fundamentally sonic in nature. One that is not supposed to include your obnoxious, lame-ass voice.—Anonymous