I, Anonymous 

You flattened my cat

You heartless cretin, you murdered my cat. You drove right over her in your big, fat, red S.U.V., speeding down a residential street, and you didn't even stop. I know you saw her because you slowed, then sped away. I curse you, and I hope someday you will have to drive the person you love most to the hospital. They will die in your arms, drown in their own blood, gurgling and coughing their last breath all over you and your nice clean shirt. You and your big fucking car will be stuck in traffic while you contemplate your loss. A big car and a black heart can't get you everything, motherfucker. Fate has her finger pointed at you.--Anonymous

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To submit your own rant, rave or confession, email anonymous@portlandmercury.com


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