I, Anonymous 

I Hate You More Than Your Granny

I'm working my way through nursing school and, in order to get some experience, am working as a Certified Nursing Assistant in a nursing home. But I want you to know that just because I'm hired to take care of your parents and grandparents doesn't mean that I have to like them. In fact, I hate YOU more than I hate them. They piss and shit in their bed, and then I'm supposed to have them all nice and clean smelling for you when you get off your ass and come to visit them for two seconds. When your old man pisses all over himself, don't take it out on me. I have 30 other residents to take care of. It's not a proud moment for me when I realize that your dad has a major boner while I'm trying to wash him off. What? Your mom is losing too much weight? Well too fucking bad! It's her choice, because she won't open up her goddamn mouth to be fed. You're complaining that granny has another bruise? Well then, tell her to stay in her fucking bed, since she can't hold up all 500 pounds of her fat ass. If these people mean that much to you, then don't complain about the care that I give them. Take care of them yourself.--Anonymous

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To submit your own rant, rave or confession, email anonymous@portlandmercury.com

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