I, Anonymous 

Suicide's Greatest Hits

I am so sick and tired of seeing ads and infomercials for really stupid CD compilations. How many people are really going to spend $19.99 on the best '80s love songs or techno hits of the '90s? Nostalgia is overrated. If they really want to make money, why doesn't someone just create a mix CD called Songs to Kill Yourself To? Not to sound like a morbid suicide promoter, but simply as an entrepreneur. What Cure-, Nick Drake-, Radiohead-, Sarah McLachlan-, Staind-, Tears For Fears-, Nirvana-, Joni Mitchell-listening angsty teen, goth, punk, nerd, bulimic, lonely housewife, chain-smoking, closeted-gay, emotional, newspaper-reading, post-breakup, AA member, didn't-make-the-sports-team, laid-off, or never-been-laid type of person wouldn't buy that? Seriously. I guess the only problem is that you couldn't count on repeat customers to be around in order to buy Songs to Kill Yourself To... Again! Too bad.—Anonymous

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