I, Anonymous 

We Insist You a Merry Christmas

Christmas, Christmas, Christmas! I am not saying, "Happy Holidays." Even though I'm not religious, Catholic, or Christian, I will still say MERRY CHRISTMAS. Why? Maybe I like the word! Get over it, you attention-seeking, victimized, mis-educated, hypocritical pieces of shit. I don't care if you celebrate Kwanzaa, or Hanukkah, or nothing at ALL this time of year. I say MERRY CHRISTMAS. If you are Jewish, then you can wish me a Happy Hanukkah, and I will smile. If you are from Africa, wish me a Happy Kwanzaa, and I will smile. I'm not going to jump down your throats for doing so just because I'm not a BLACK JEW! And if you want to talk about the Holiday Tree downtown, die. Please. Now. It's just a tree: deciduous foliage that remains green and functional through more than one growing season. To me, it's a Christmas Tree. To you it's something else. Don't chastise me for calling it a Christmas Tree. You keep the spirit of this time of year in your way, and keep the hell out of my life you over-sensitive, complaining casualty of political correctness. Merry Christmas and shove your Happy Holidays up your ass.—Anonymous

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To submit your own rant, rave or confession, email anonymous@portlandmercury.com


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