I, Anonymous 

Not on Your Sidewalk

Oh, the blossoming days of early summer: shorts and tank tops, peonies and breaking the bike out of the garage. I have nothing against you, oh fair-weather bike rider. I am one of you. My cruiser only cruises when I won't get wet, and that's okay. What's not okay? You riding on the sidewalk. See those wheels below you? See those break levers in your hands? Your bike is a vehicle, and it belongs in the street. There are laws that make riding on the sidewalk inconvenient—you can't ride faster than a pedestrian walks, you have to give verbal warnings—and it's really flippin' unsafe. Do you think small children are warned to "stay out of the sidewalk?!" No. Are people worried about their dog running down the sidewalk? No. Because they rightly assume there isn't a speeding vehicle on that sidewalk. If you are not a small child or a very, very old lady—get on the street. Portland has an amazing network of totally safe bike paths and highways. Use them. And get off the f*cking sidewalk.—Anonymous

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To submit your own rant, rave or confession, email anonymous@portlandmercury.com

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