TO THE EDITOR: Thanks for revealing what I always hoped would happen. [Re: From Where I Sit, Sean Tejaratchi, July 27, in which the art director berates the Mercury's newest sales assistant, Brodie Hylton] My son, Brodie, now wears fashionable short pants. This is very comforting to his parents, I can assure you, since we live in southern California--where these things matter a great deal. As far as the misplaced vowels are concerned, I assume this is in reference to his Canadian ancestry, eh? Regardless, we're glad he's workingeven with you. Continued success!

Brodie's Dad

A CRITICAL LETTER ASKING A CRITIC NOT TO BE CRITICAL

DEAR JULIANNE SHEPHERD: I should be speechless after reading your dissection of Mandarin [Up & Coming, July 27] but you've moved me to write my first-ever letter to a publication. Where the fuck did you come from? Take your eating-its-own-dead punk rock Renaissance and crawl back to Indy High School where you can whine in peace about how rebellious you are by staying out late and smoking a clove cigarette.

Mandarin writes great music with some of the best lyrics I've ever heard, and in my opinion their brand of rock'n'roll is a damned sight more authentic, sincere, and real than a bunch of Guinness-drinking dipshits who have nothing to say and say it with volume.

I'm really sorry to see that someone as shallow and derivative as yourself has crawled into print. Personally, I love this city and this scene. What do you do for it?

Clint Kaster

D.K. HOLM: 5 TONS OF TROUBLE

TO THE EDITOR: D.K. Holm needs his mouth washed out with battery acid. His review of A Piece of Cake [Theater Review, August 27] belongs in the bottom of the septic tank.

I attended opening night and found it powerful, funny, well directed, well acted, and one of the best late night shows to hit Portland in years. I sat with two well-respected theater people here in Portland, one well-respected director and one top-notch actor who has appeared in many highly esteemed roles locally.

All three thought the play was brilliant. The pace was truly frenetic, but that's what makes this type of play work. I don't know whether to pity Holm's obvious lack of theatrical knowledge or to ban him to re-runs of Let's Make a Deal which are obviously his level of artistic understanding.

Freedom of press? Yes. But for a new weekly newspaper, you apparently feel you need a 5 ton millstone around your neck named D.K. Holm.

Maria Turcott

INTERNATIONAL PROMOTER HATES MERCURY, JAMIE S. RICH, PREVIEWS, AND PORTLAND

TO THE EDITOR: My name is Brian Williamson, I am an international event producer, promoter and forthcoming venue partner presently residing in literally lame Portland. My cohorts (many of whom, for lack of anything better, still support you with advertising) and I had high hopes for the Mercury.

I am writing you regarding a so-called "preview" for an event Mike Thrasher and I produced ["Arling & Cameron, DJ Me DJ You, Dahlia," Jamie S. Rich, July 20].

In my business I have received very few sorry previews, from clueless, closed-minded, rockhead writers who've never even attempted to attend the events that would have made them eat their words. I have never understood why publications like the Mercury and Willamette Week attempt reviews in advance (calling them "previews") when they haven't seen a show or even read The New York Times review. It seems especially unprofessional and disrespectful to the sponsors (such as myself & Thrasher) interests when it is inaccurately negatively biased. If Mr. Rich had actually seen the tour in another city, he might be fit to comment. It is obvious from his description that he has not, and it also appears he has not even read the tour bio or bothered to listen to the entire disc.

I'm not going to try to defend the entire recording, call it brilliant or even say that I enjoy all of it. My enjoyment (and reputation) comes from facilitating creative, interesting, and original outings such as this. Idiotic critique does not further the cause of making this possible for Portland or any other culturally starved area.

BW