TO THE MERCURY: You're weaving a web of drivel and misinformation ["It Sure is a Scientific World," John Dooley, August 16]. Incorrectly, Mr. Dooley whines about VHEMT (Voluntary Human Extinction Movement), "They want me to die. They want you to die too." Does Dooley have his paranoid head up his ass or what? In fact, one of VHEMT's mottos is "May we live long and die out." It doesn't take a rocket scientist wanna-be to figure out we are a species out of control and should consider not procreating, as there are a few billion too many of us already. What part of "voluntary" do you not understand? Bottom line: they want you to voluntarily not procreate.
EL SAXOPHONE ES MUY MACHO!
DEAR WM. STEVEN HUMPHREY: This is Seantos, also known as "Sax Guy." I was so happy to see something about my band [Starantula] in your delightfully trashy rag ["Up & Coming," Aug 23, in which Humphrey likes the band, but hates the sax]. I suggest you come down to our show, if you're not busy destroying every saxophone in existence. You knew I would respond, but if you think I'm hurt guess again, Lou Grant! Great job (even though I know some sax player stole your true love, and that's why you're bitter at the most muy macho instrument of all time!). Oh, and by the way, comparing me to Kenny G is akin to comparing you to Jonathan Nichols. Both award winners both gay!
Seantos the Sax Guy
INTERSEX SURGERY: PRO-CHOICE!
TO THE EDITOR: Thank you, Mercury and Katia Dunn, for publishing a wonderful story about intersex and ISNA ["What Gender Am I Again?" Katia Dunn, Aug 26]! There seems to have been some miscommunication between Katia and myself, though. Most errors are innocent and insignificant (e.g. ISNA has three paid positions, not five as suggested in the article), but one part needs to be clarified.
In the article I was quoted as saying we should accept bodies as they are, but this is contrary to my personal belief, as well as to ISNA's position regarding surgical and hormonal treatments. If I said these words, I must have said it in the context that parents should accept their children as they are. For the record, we are not pro or anti-surgery, but pro-choice. We support the rights of informed adolescents and adults to make decisions regarding their own bodies, whether they are intersex or not. We oppose unnecessary genital surgeries on infants and young children not because we oppose all cosmetic surgeries, but because we support their freedom of choice. Anyway, keep up the great work!
Intersex Society of North America (www.isna.org)
ANOTHER FUCKING HIPPIE TRYING TO TELL YOU HOW TO FEEL
TO EVERYONE ANGRY AT THE MERCURY'S REVIEWS: Dudes, dudes, it's okay, dudes. Just chill, alright? Nah, nope--shhh. Mellow, mellow mellow mmmeeelllllloooowwww. Yes, that's right; let it go. We must learn, dudes and dudes, to accept that some people do not recognize that Patti Smith is definitely not "non-great" or whatever ["Letters," Aug 16]. And, dudes, it's the Mercury. So just go with the flow. Relax. It's cool, baby.
Oscar Quequeg Quagmire Fairchild-Williams II, III, IV, or V
POWER RANGERS: HOT OR NOT?
TO WM.™ STEVEN HUMPHREY: [Re: "I Love Television"] Far be it from you to dignify a show like Power Rangers Time Force by watching it, but if you could settle a bet I'd appreciate it.
Who's the hotter ranger? I say it's Wes, the Red Ranger (played by Jason Faunt) but a friend of mine says it's Lucas, the Blue Ranger (played by Michael Copon). There is a dollar riding on this that I desperately need to buy more Ramen noodles.
Wm.™ Steven Humphrey responds: You're kiddin' me, right? Lucas is SO hot, and Wes is SO not! Look at them! Wes has that "Oooh! I look just like James Van Der Beek" attitude that makes me want to smash his face in! And his hair? Honey, somebody gave him a certificate to Super Cuts. Lucas is the hottest, and if you have any further doubts, remember this adage: "No matter what the occasion, go with the Asian." Hope your buddy enjoys his Ramen.