DEAR MERCURY: Could you please explain the fixation this town has with Pabst Blue Ribbon? The hipsters, in specific, have developed a strong sense of brand-loyalty for this pilsner. I've seen bike messengers and other shaggy-headed poster children of the thrift-store nation with PBR patches sewn to their clothes. Why? I recently drank a pint of it and, quite frankly, could not differentiate it from any of the other crap on tap. Bud, Coors, Miller--it all looks, smells, and tastes the same to me. I understand the economic incentive to "PBR me ASAP," but in a region where you can get good local beer for two bucks (Henry's) or great local beer for three to four bucks (Rouge, Bridgeport, Deshutes), why do people poison themselves with that shit?
HMMMINTERESTING QUESTION, B-MA! Let's ask the readers and find out. Send in your best defense of PBR (150 words or less, please!), and the best letter will receive an ill-fitting Pabst T-shirt that has probably been washed. We're not kidding! Send in your letters!
ARTISTS FIGHT BACK
TO THE EDITOR: I am writing in support of P4's decision to bring the issue of rape into the public consciousness by way of artistic activism ["As Sick as Your Secrets," News, April 25]. Their signs identifying places where women were violated reminded me of a similar action in 1980, when Boston artist EVER*NON created seven sculptures and cemented them at places where women were raped.
Anyone interested in seeing pictures of the sculptures, and learning more about other creative ways to speak out against sexual violence should read Fight Back! Feminist Resistance to Male Violence, edited by Frederique Delacoste and Felice Newman.
WHO'S THE IMBECILE?
HEY!!: Where's Frank Cassano's "Imbecile Parade" ["New Column!" April 11-25]? Why get rid of the funniest piece from your fine publication? Who would replace the hysterical and poignant character studies of Frank Cassano with a goddamn Spider-Man maze [May 2]? I'll tell you who: a fucking imbecile!
LOOK AT ANN, MAKING WITH THE FUNNY
TO THE EDITOR: What the hell has gotten into Ann Romano? Her normally funny-enough-to-make-you-feel-good but never laugh-out-loud funny One Day at a Time article was fucking hilarious this week [May 2]! Her zesty analysis of adult Spider-Man fans, the line "[Roman Catholic leaders have] decided to take it easy on those who have stuck their dicks in kids only once or twice," the cleverly recurring theme amounting Vogue to the Bible--who's this sassy new Ann? Hilarious! Keep it up!
"LIMOUSINE LIBERALS" STINK!
DEAR EDITOR: I'd like to offer a quick Portland geography lesson to all those limousine liberals, elitist academics, and former elected officials (who haven't been elected to anything since Reagan's first term) who oppose measure 26-30, the Good Government Initiative.
East Portland includes more than Sellwood and Hawthorne. And North Portland represents more than Alameda and Irvington. And just because you went shopping for antiques in Sellwood or had "a lovely little dinner" on NE Broadway doesn't mean you understand the complexity of neighborhood issues.
In the entire history of Portland there has never been an elected city commissioner who lived East of 39th. Measure 26-30 will change that and bring much needed representation to ALL citizens of this great city.
Justin H. Clark
REAL WOMEN LOVE SPIDER-MAN
DEAR MERCURY: This is for Ann Romano, that prissy ass who thinks Spider-Man is just for the boys [One Day at a Time, May 2]. Honey, maybe you're content to peruse the pages of Cosmo whilst getting your nails done, but rest assured not all women are big sissies like you. Let me tell you, there are girls a-plenty (hetero or otherwise) who like Spider-Man, beer with their pizza, and video games, damnit! Thanks so much, Ann, for promoting gender stereotyping. I DON'T SEE IT ENOUGH! So have fun with your Sex in the City wannabe friends, drinking lemon drops and whining about why you can't find a good man. I'll be sitting on the couch playing GTA 3 with a Henry's in one hand, a poster of Spidey on my wall, and hanging with all the long-sought "good men." Bitch.
CONGRATS TO MELINDA for writing the Mercury "Letter of the Week" and winning free tix to the Laurelhurst Theater. Write in and you could be our next winner!