THURSDAY, APRIL 4

FILA BRASILA--This is the latest in god-blessed, genre-busting innovation. Combining everything from heavy hiphop beats and African chanting vocals to classic harmonic arrangements, Fila Brasilia pulls the best of unlikely worlds together. If your date doesn't like it, ditch 'em--they're square. MS

Berbati's Pan, 231 SW Ankeny, 248-4579, 9 pm, $10

THEATER--Peter Sagal is funny in that NPR egghead way--humor prefaced more on current events than farts and bawdiness. Sagal is the host of NPR's Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me and his play Mall America is tightly scripted, about a woman trying to make sense of her life after witnessing a random shooting. Macabre, funny, and arrestingly insightful. PB

Coho Theater, 2257 NW Raleigh, 220-2646, Thurs-Sat 8 pm, Sun 2 pm, $13-15

FRIDAY, APRIL 5

FILM--Were you too busy to walk the red carpet at this year's Oscar gala? Then you have a second chance at tonight's showing of Oscar Nominated Shorts. This program features the best of live-action and animated short film nominees from around the world and promises thrilling entertainment for those with short-attention spans. (But please... if you're thinking about wearing Gwyneth Paltrow's dress? For God's sake, wear a bra.) WSH

Whitsell Auditorium, 1219 SW Park, 221-1156, 7:30 pm, $6.50

MUSIC--Sometimes songs don't smack you until they're covered by the right people. Tonight, Carla Bozulich and the Nels Cline Singers cover Willie Nelson's album Red Headed Stranger. Even if you're anti-aged hippies, Cline will blow you out of your pants with what he can do to a guitar. MS

Dante's, 1 SW 3rd Ave, 224-TIXX, 9 pm, $10

SATURDAY, APRIL 6

KARAOKE FORMAL--Need an excuse to get dressed up and drunk and make an ass out of yourself? No, I never need one either. Sing your favorite song (recommended: "These Eyes," "I Want You to Want Me," or "Tell it to My Heart" by Taylor Dayne), and maybe you'll be so lucky as to have your horrendous wail masked by the soothing live sounds of backup band Karaoke from Hell. Also, enjoy licking free ice cream off your partner's neck while dancing to the turntable madness of Sweet Pancakes and Crystal Lake (also a city in Illinois). KS

Eagle's Lodge, 4904 SE Hawthorne, 9 pm, $5 stag, $8 couple, 21 and over

POLKA--Don't underestimate the polka, the most hypnotic and addictive dance--the unironic wave of the future: Jump twice on your left foot, then switch, and jump twice on your right foot. Again and again and again. Oom-pah, oom-pah. A pull-out-all-the-stops polka party put on by the Cacophany Society, with awards for "biggest hair," "cabbage passing," and "best bowling shirt." PB

Norse Hall, 111 NE 11th, 635-2805, 7:30-midnight, $6-9 ($17, if dressed in all black), 18 and under must be with an adult

SUNDAY, APRIL 7

PORN--Portland is being invaded by randy Texan feminists! Although the name Gynomite holds a negligible degree of sex appeal for all, these girls and their porn-erotic spoken word performance are balls-out titillating. MS

Reed Student Union, 3203 SE Woodstock, 8pm, $5-7 sliding scale

DR. KEVORKIOKE--A magical evening at the Blackbird featuring a new karaoke game created by that sick fuck Wm. Steven Humphrey and his demented sidekick Lance Chess (ex-lead singer of Harm's Arms). Be prepared: if you have to do suicide karaoke, to make it less scary, you'll have assistance from Dr. Wm. Steven--"Dr. Kevorkioke"-- and his minons. Get there early to put in your songs; this shit gets OOC (out of control). KS

Blackbird, 3725 SE Sandy, 282-9949, 9 pm, $3

MONDAY, APRIL 8

READING--Do you really believe the pigs didn't have anything to do with the murders of Tupac and Biggie? Didn't think so. Hear/read this story about the LAPD's supposed involvement in rubbing out these thugs, by undercover reporter Randall Sullivan, in his book Labyrinth. KD

Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 228-4651, 7:30 pm, free

TUESDAY, APRIL 9

MUSIC--Armed with a laptop and an acoustic guitar, Greg Davis' music is completely unpredictable--some kind of folk-electronica hybrid teetering purposely off-balance and tinkering with different musical weights; pastoral acoustic guitar work, discordant when crushed by his computer. BG

w/Hrvatski, E*Rock, Nice Nice; Blackbird, 3728 NE Sandy, 282-9949, 9 pm, $6

WEDNESDAY, APRIL 10

MUSIC--Don't miss Avey Tare, Panda Bear, Geologist, and Deaken, aka New York's Animal Collective, and their spazzy electronics that play out as twisted nightmare versions of pop songs. It's creepy horror movie music, somewhere between free jazz and the soundtrack to Rosemary's Baby--believe me, it sounds better than it sounds. JS

w/Get Hustle, Love Life, Pleasure Forever; Blackbird, 3728 NE Sandy, 282-9949, 9 pm, $7