WARWICK DAVIS—This year, celebrate St. Patrick's Day as the Irish have for centuries: By watching the 1993 horror classic Leprechaun, starring Warwick Davis as a vicious, rhyme-happy imp who loves only one thing more than his gold... BLOOD! Presented by Jackpot Records, this screening will also include green beer and Jennifer Aniston's original nose. EH
Hollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7 pm, $7, all ages

FREAKY—You know what's three times as scary as a killer leprechaun?! HUGE eyeball people who wear tuxedos, that's what. Don't miss those legendary weirdoes the Residents as they bring their trippy multimedia shenanigans to town. They'll be sporting new sequin-y, gas mask-y, dreadlock-y outfits, which might be even creepier than those middle-distance-staring eyeball masks. CF
Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $23-26


PAINT IT, BLACK—The artful, baleful music of Warpaint is persistently enveloping, drawing over your ears a thick, heavy curtain of post-punk, art-folk, ambient-rave-prog-rock, and other previously nonexistent genres. The all-female LA quartet's debut album The Fool never reveals its entrancing mysteries, despite countless compulsive re-listens. NL
w/PVT, Family Band; Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $13, all ages

FANCY DANCE—The intimidatingly fine-tuned bodies of the Northwest Dance Project premiere their annual spring performance, Contemporary Ballet at Its Best. The dancers slink about to three numbers, including the choreography of Patrick Delcroix and NWDP's Artistic Director Sarah Slipper, plus the sexy, full-company ballet Blue. JL
Newmark Theatre, 1111 SW Broadway, Fri & Sat, 8 pm, $25-40


FRESH LIKE SPRING—No matter what the planets and groundhogs have to say about it, the most tangible hopeful sign of spring's arrival is the reopening of the Portland Farmers Market. Time to hop on the bike and welcome back your favorite purveyors of yum. MS
SW Park & Montgomery, 8:30 am-2 pm, every Sat 'til mid-December

REAL FOOTBALL—It's finally here. After countless sawed logs from Timber Jim and Joey and a whole lotta cash from Merritt Paulson—oh, and some pretty entertaining soccer as well—the Portland Timbers enter the MLS tonight. Watch the 2011 season kickoff as the Timbers take on the Colorado Rapids. EAC
Bagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 6 pm, FREE, all ages, broadcast on Root Sports/FSC


KUSTOMIZE—It's time again for the super-fun Portland Roadster Show, featuring some of the nation's hottest kustom cars, designers, pin-stripers, and this year, a movie/TV show-themed challenge! See the Mystery Machine, Tarantino's Death Proof car, Smokey and the Bandit's Trans Am, and more in a nostalgia battle to the finish! WSH
Portland Expo Center, 2060 N Marine, Fri noon-9 pm, Sat 10 am-9 pm, Sun 10 am-7 pm, $15

NATURE—The always inspiring nature writer Barry Lopez joins author Mark Tredinnick for a conversation about ecology, mythology, and humanity's place in the natural world, inspired by Tredinnick's new book The Blue Plateau. AH
Powell's City of Books, 1005 W Burnside, 7:30 pm, FREE


BIRDSONG—The winsome folk-pop of the Finches is sweet but never squeaky, relaxed but never drowsy. With their new release, On Golden Hill, the California band will gently wrap its cute little finch talons around your heart and fiercely refuse to let go. Get ready to fall in love, hard. NL
w/Key Losers, Alina Hardin; Valentine's, 232 SW Ankeny, 9 pm, FREE

POISON BURGERS—Monday night gets a little crazy at Starky's, the salt-of-the-earth gay bar on SE Stark. Not only are their tasty burgers on $5 special, top-notch drag queen Poison Waters fills in as hostess, dishing up your cheap eats with a side of mega sass. SM
Starky's, 2913 SE Stark St, 5:30-10 pm


GIVE A SHIT—Do you give a shit about politics or your community? Do you also like beer? Stop by the Bus Project/Mercury's new monthly happy hour, Give a Shit Club, to meet other Portlanders who give a shit (or even two!) and learn about local activist, advocacy, and arts projects. SM
Guild Public House, 1101 E Burnside, 6:30-8 pm, FREE

WALL BALL—We all know that the Washington Wizards are not good at the sport of basketball. In addition to tonight's likely Portland Trail Blazers' victory, you will get a glimpse of the Wizards' lone reason for existing, rookie phenom John Wall. He's good, just not good enough to carry an entire team. EAC
Rose Garden, 1 Center Ct, 7 pm, $12-160


DREAM WEAVER—Portland designer Laurie Herrick gained a reputation in the craft world for remarkable, colorful weavings before her death in 1995. In honor of the Museum of Contemporary Craft's 75th anniversary they're hosting the retrospective Laurie Herrick: Weaving Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow. MS
Museum of Contemporary Craft, 724 NW Davis, Tues-Sat 11 am-6 pm, through July 30

POLITBEATS—JD Samson (formerly of Le Tigre) rolls into town fronting MEN, a Brooklyn-based band dedicated to bringing politics to the dance floor. Their debut full-length, Talk About Body, offers a uniquely ass-shaking take on queer lifestyle politics. AH
w/Lovers, Macromantics, Silver Interior, Mr. Charming; Rotture, 315 SE 3rd, 9 pm, $10-12