THURSDAY, JULY 26
NEW SKIN—Artistic hub/boutique Nationale teams up with the Sound + Vision Festival to bring you an evening in tribute to Leonard Cohen, "New Skin for the Old Ceremony," in two parts. First a program of 11 short films inspired by the Master of Erotic Despair, followed by live cover sets from Neal Morgan, Robin Pecknold, and more. MSHollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 8 pm, $8 ($15 for three-day fest pass)
HEE HAW—We'd tell you go see the spectacular Emmylou Harris anyway—her clearwater voice only gets better with age—but when you throw Steve Martin on the bill? Turns out the genius comedian is also a stunningly good banjo player, so expect to be awed by his pickin' skills when he's not cracking wise. NLEdgefield, 2126 SW Halsey, Troutdale, 6:30 pm, $47-89, all ages
FRIDAY, JULY 27
GREAT NOTION—The Sometimes a Great Notion Festival hopes to surprise and confuse. And it is kind of confusing, like, who is Metal Postcard Records? And why are Peaking Lights sharing a stage with the Felice Brothers? But with a stellar lineup with local favorites like Onuinu, White Fang, and more it should be great! ZPDisjecta, 8371 NE Interstate, Fri 6 pm-midnight, Sat noon-midnight, Sun noon-10 pm, $25-55, all ages
SNAPPY BIRTHDAY—For five years Snap! has been snapping your ass on the dance floor with bona fide ass-waggling hits from the '90s! Join 'em tonight at the Snap! '90s Dance Party: Fifth Year Anniversary, and wiggle on down with turntablists Dr. Adam, Colin Jones, and Spies Like Us—plus a '90s-style costume contest! WSHHolocene, 1001 SE Morrison, 9 pm, $3-5
SATURDAY, JULY 28
ALL'S FAIRE—Let us gather in our hood, surrounded by prancing hounds and gurgling smallfolk to listen to the dulcet music of our peers. We shall shop the wares of our finest merchants and enjoy artisanal snow cones and sudsy grog. 'Tis the 20th annual Division/Clinton Street Fair! Now let us celebrate and make merry! CFMain stage at SE 41st & Division, second stage at SE 25th & Clinton, 10 am-10 pm, parade at 10:45 am, FREE
DIG IT—Hard to believe it's only been a year since Dig a Pony wormed into the hearts of hipsters across the city. For their year-one bash they've rounded up live music from Miracles Club and Thanks, and DJ sets from local greats Rev Shines and Cooky Parker—for free. It's gonna be cray! MSDig a Pony, 736 SE Grand, 8 pm, FREE
SUNDAY, JULY 29
FLOATZILLA—The Big Float was so much fun last year, when thousands of inner-tube-floatin' Portlanders crossed the Willamette River in style, then celebrated their collective whimsy with cart food, music, and beer. It's time again to cool off in our local swimmin' hole, so bring a life jacket (totes required!), something to float on, and your swim gear! CFEast end of the Hawthorne Bridge, registration 10 am-noon, parade to launch at 12:30 pm, $5, thebigfloat.com
JAW—Portland Center Stage's annual playwriting fest is a chance to see staged readings of exciting new plays for free, before they go on to receive full productions in theaters around the country. This weekend's big draw: The debut of former Daily Show correspondent Lauren Weedman's The People's Republic of Portland. Just how much loving mockery can one city bear??!? AHPortland Center Stage, 128 NW 11th, Thurs-Sun, pcs.org/jaw for show details & times, FREE
MONDAY, JULY 30
CHEAP SWEETS—While your fave sweet shop Pix Patisserie may be closing down their SE Division and N Williams locations (the spankin' new shop will be on 2225 E Burnside), they're shutting down the old spots with a bang! Tonight enjoy cheap drinks, dancing, and yummy Pix treats that will get cheaper as the night progresses and eventually? Free! WSHPix Patisserie, 3402 SE Division, 3901 N Williams, 8 pm, FREE, specials all night
FUNNIES—Political cartoonist and writer Tim Kreider blew up the internet a few weeks ago with a New York Times piece called "The 'Busy' Trap," but his most controversial piece was a campaign in defense of Pluto's planethood. Tonight the black-minded humorist overcomes his existential dread for long enough to read from We Learn Nothing: Essays and Cartoons. AHPowell's Books on Hawthorne, 3723 SE Hawthorne, 7:30 pm, FREE
TUESDAY, JULY 31
GRINDHOUSE—Few film collectors can match the stash of the Hollywood Theatre's Dan Halsted—and tonight, he's busting into his vault for the Grindhouse Trailer Spectacular 3, 70 minutes' worth of trailers for "some of the most mind-blowing pieces of cinema to ever rip through a film projector." EHHollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $7
ENVELOPE PUSHER—Bitcrushing acid techno pioneer Squarepusher is playing a very rare live show in Portland tonight (and he's giving Seattle a miss on this tour, ha ha). His dizzying, warped beats are given mind-blowing treatment via intricate live visuals, so get ready for an assault on all the senses. NLw/Natasha Kmeto; Wonder Ballroom, 128 NE Russell, 9 pm, $30-35
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 1
CAT WEDNESDAY—ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!!!! One of only four performing housecat troupes in the US, the Amazing Acro-Cats RING BELLS, WALK TIGHTROPES, and RIDE SKATEBOARDS. And they are accompanied by an all-cat band, the Rock Cats. I cannot wait for this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EHHeadwaters Theatre, 55 NE Farragut, #9, 7 pm, through Aug 14, $20, circuscats.com
ROCKY HORROR—The sky brings us light and hope. But really, it's an arbiter of random doom. OMSI's Science Pub—in a lecture bluntly named Death from the Skies!—will tell you all about all the falling space rocks that have wrecked the planet in eons past. Then it'll tell you how humanity might finally have learned how to protect the place. DCTBagdad Theater, 3702 SE Hawthorne, 7 pm, $20