THURSDAY, AUGUST 23
PERETTI—Chelsea Peretti's had a hand in some of your favorite TV shows (Parks and Rec, Louie), she's twice as smart as you are, and her stand-up is full of wicked-sharp observations about what it's like to be a woman with a "weird attractiveness level." Ladies, bring your boyfriends—they might learn something. AHHelium Comedy Club, 1510 SE 9th, Thurs 8 pm, Fri-Sat 7:30 & 10 pm, $15-25
CLASSIC JUNKIES—Matt Dillon and Heather Graham's characters in Drugstore Cowboy would have loved tonight's screening of the film under the moon on the roof of the Hotel deLuxe. With the crowd enthralled by Gus Van Sant's classic film of Pacific Northwest junkie life, the pair would have the perfect chance do a little hustling, picking up some purses, Prius keys, and hotel towels. SMw/Brooks Robertson; Hotel deLuxe, 729 SW 15th, music starts at 8 pm, $9
FRIDAY, AUGUST 24
NIPPLES—The Mercury and the Hollywood Theatre's ridiculously popular Hecklevision series—in which audience members text wisecracks that instantly pop up onscreen—is back! Up this time: Batman & Robin, the execrable batflick featuring 5,324 ice-related puns from Schwarzenegger's Mr. Freeze, an embarrassed George Clooney, nipples on the batsuits, and a lot of homoeroticism. EHHollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $8
LASER MOMS—Listen to the new Menomena record a month before it comes out, and you won't have to sit there looking at stupid nothing. No, look at awesomecoolbadass LASERS as the new album, Moms, blares—and so what if they're just using all the old, stock Pink Floyd lasers? It worked for The Wizard of Oz, and it will totally work for Menomena. NLOMSI, 1945 SE Water, 11 pm, $5
SATURDAY, AUGUST 25
REAL DEAL—Long before Mumfords took over the world, there were the Avett Brothers, playing folk-flecked pop with real heart. The good news is that the Avetts are still setting crowds alight, as they will during this two-night run at Edgefield. The other good news is that an album is right around the corner, so expect lots of new tunes. NLEdgefield, 2126 SW Halsey, Troutdale, Sat & Sun 7 pm, $40-45, all ages
ROCK-AWAY BEACH—Sick of driving all the way out to far-flung rivers to do some floating? Join the Big Float organizers to clear out the rocks that line our city's sandy beach on the Willamette River. After a few hours of calorie-burning squats and dead lifts, you can celebrate Stumptown's new swimming hole with a refreshing dip. CFTom McCall Waterfront Park (south of Hawthorne Bridge), 9 am-2 pm, bring gloves & work shoes
SUNDAY, AUGUST 26
GO OUTSIDE—Summer, summer, summer forever!! Ice cream! Dogs! Jean shorts! Bicycles! Leafy parks! Sunglasses! Tacos! Young love! Old people love! All these things forever and ever today as Sunday Parkways intersects with the Hawthorne Street Fair, blocking off nine miles of Southeast Portland streets to cars and opening them up to everything wonderful. SMView Parkways route map at portlandoregon.gov, 11 am-4 pm; Hawthorne Street Fair, 10 am-5 pm, hawthornestreetfair.com
LOVE BOAT—The college radio station at PSU needs a FM license. So why not take a benefit cruise on a summery Portland night with the DJs and supporters of KPSU? Pop open some champs and boogie down in your boat shoes to the sultry pop tunes of Unknown Mortal Orchestra and Radiation City. Ahoy! CFPortland Spirit, SW Salmon & Naito, 10:30 pm, $20, all ages
MONDAY, AUGUST 27
ANOTHER 48 HOURS—Every year, daring Portland filmmakers take part in the 48-Hour Film Project—giving themselves only two days to make a complete short film. At tonight's Best of the Portland 48-Hour Film Project, you can see the 14 best shorts that came from their time-crunched efforts. EHHollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $8
EERIE—Mount Eerie has been sitting dormant since 2009, but this year quintessential Northwest musician Phil Elverum is releasing two albums under that moniker: Clear Moon came out in May and Ocean Roar is dropping in September. Like Elverum's best work, Ocean Roar is atmospheric, emotionally urgent, and slightly stressful—in a good way. AHw/Key Losers; Mississippi Studios, 3939 N Mississippi, 9 pm, $10-12
TUESDAY, AUGUST 28
GET MAD—Sure, you can get mad about conservatives trampling women's rights—or you can have fun and be fashionable at the same time! It's Planned Parenthood Columbia Willamette's Mad Mixer Party, in which you dress up in the swanky mid-century style of Mad Men, dance to the music of DJ Gregarious, and maybe even win a costume contest! Benefits rarely look this good! WSHSomeday Lounge, 125 NW 5th, 7 pm, $5-10 sliding scale
SPAWNAGE—Don't you hate it when eel-like aliens land on Earth and start squirting out baby alien eels in your basement? Yeah... ew. But trust me, you'll love the 1983 low-budget cheese-tastic horror flick The Deadly Spawn, in which teens take on these squirmy-ass aliens in order to save the world! Hey, at least it's not happening in your basement. WSHHollywood Theatre, 4122 NE Sandy, 7:30 pm, $7
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 29
SCIENCE. WHATEVER.—OMSI After Dark is courting "hipster" caricatures this week, with a program heavy on obscure music and futuristic fashion, but that's no reason to stay away. Drink up while making your very own duct-tape wallet. Sway your NES-toughened thumbs to chiptune music. Or just enjoy live songs courtesy of and Blue Skies for Black Hearts. DCTOMSI, 1945 SE Water, 7 pm, $15, 21+
FUSE—In January, I got a press release that read "REFUSED NOT F***ING DEAD," and sure enough, the Swedish band resurrected itself to play Coachella. Now Refused is coming to town to blast our ears with raging hardcore that refuses (eh?) to stay within genre boundaries. Sleigh Bells open, whose seismic blasts of pop have more in common with Refused than you might think. NLRoseland, 8 NW 6th, 7:30 pm, $39, all ages
