Really people, I swore I was done with scouring the web for more handy (and bizarre) marriages of technology and music, but thanks to some useful reader tips, the following sites (and products) just cannot be ignored.
Oh, ho-hum, an iPod vibrator... yawn, how 2005. But wait, what's this? Not just one, but two iPod vibrators? Poor Consumer Reports, now some intern there is going to have to test both of them.
The first one, the iBuzz ($60, ibuzzusa.com), works by simply vibrating in time with your music, so you can get tenderly romantic with the soft buzz of Will Oldham's voice, or do some lifelong vaginal damage with Cannibal Corpse. iBuzz does get some extra points for the selection of additional accessories, including the "Vibrating Bullet," the "Knobbled Stimulating Sleeve," and one your boyfriend will secretly use while you're at work, the "Spike Cock Ring (for Him)."
The other method of sexualizing your poor MP3 player is the Audi-Oh iPod Vibrator ($69 from grandopening.com). This one's way more intimidating-looking, resembling a weird plastic sexual spider that straps on with a tiny leather harness. The bonus (other than the clever name, of course) of the Audi-Oh is that it works with anything that produces sound and has an audio jack; so once you wear out those notoriously weak iPod batteries you can move on to the portable CD player, or even plug it into your TV and get off with every sweet word that leaves Bill O'Reilly's mouth.
If you've yet to give up on commercial radio in exchange for pandora.com—or perhaps an iPod that stimulates you sexually—then might I suggest yes.com? Before you tune in, you can log on to this site and see what your favorite stations are playing right this very second. In fact, you can search what's playing on all area stations by typing in a zip code. For example, our local station of the Lord (104.1 The Fish) played Carrie Underwood's "Jesus, Take the Wheel" at 7:10 am this morning, which was good to know since I hate that song. When it comes to Christian music, I'm more old school. We have a little saying around these parts: "If it ain't dc Talk, it's shit."
This is a product I'll actually admit to using. Podbop's instructions are simple:
(1) Enter your city and state.
(2) Listen to bands that are in your town this week.
(3) Go see a concert.
That's it. While the site stills seems like it's in its infancy—the MP3 selection for upcoming Portland shows seems a little too String Cheese Incident heavy—it's easy to imagine that once it gets going, Podbop will become a site you visit on a daily basis. Plus it's about as user friendly as you can get, and encourages music fans to play a role in adding artists and contributing to the site.