8:00 CW SMALLVILLE
When Lana secretly confesses her doubts about marrying Lex, snoopy gossip columnist Tori Spelling picks up the ball and runs with it!
9:00 FOX THE O.C.
EEEP! The O.C.'s been cancelled?? This may be the last time you get to see Ryan beat the crap out of a French dude.
8:00 NBC 1 VS. 100
A single contestant takes on a mob of brainiacs including infomercial millionaires, child geniuses... and Fabio?!?
8:00 FOX NANNY 911
It's a child-rearing emergency when three little girls run roughshod over their wimpy parents! WHERE'S MY BELT?
8:00 VH1 THE WHITE RAPPER SHOW
A reality competition to find what the world really, really needs... another white rapper.
8:00 FOX 24
Season Premiere! While terrorists blow up shit back home, Jack sits in a Red Chinese gulag picking his toes.
10:00 HBO EXTRAS
Season Premiere! Ricky "The Office" Gervais stars as a beleaguered movie extra in this parody of the film biz.
8:00 FOX 24
In the second new episode of the week, Jack is still waiting to be rescued from the gulag, so he befriends a snail.
8:00 NBC GOLDEN GLOBES
I know that nobody gives a crap about these awards, but... go Borat! Go Borat! GO BORAT!
8:00 FOX AMERICAN IDOL
Season Premiere! Simon, Paula, and Randy are back to pick the next 30-year-old white soul singer. Uggh.
10:00 BRAVO REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY
Season Premiere! Check out this creepy reality show about housewives with too much time/collagen on their hands!
10:30 COM THE NAKED TRUCKER & T-BONES SHOW
Debut! A variety show starring—yes, a naked trucker and his simpleton friend.