THURSDAY, DECEMBER 17
8:00 NBC SNL PRESENTS: A VERY GILLY CHRISTMAS
Old SNL Xmas skits are paired with new ones starring Kristen Wiig's Gilly (who on average is naughty, not nice).
10:00 MTV JERSEY SHORE
In a very special holiday episode, Pauly and Mikey get drunk, hit on ladies, and get in a bar brawl. Yeah... not so special.
FRIDAY, DECEMBER 18
8:00 CBS FROSTY THE SNOWMAN
Snowman puts on hat, comes to life. But what if a bloodthirsty gargoyle was wearing it?
8:00 FOX DOLLHOUSE
Victor's contract expires, and he's released back into the world, where hot doll sex is a little harder to come by.
SATURDAY, DECEMBER 19
9:00 NBC WWE TRIBUTE TO THE TROOPS
Wrestlers (fake fighters) entertain soldiers (real fighters). Anybody besides me notice the irony?
11:30 NBC SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE
Hosted by the DA-REAMY James Franco!
SUNDAY, DECEMBER 20
8:00 CBS SURVIVOR
Season finale! I swear to god I didn't know this show was still on!
10:00 BIO SHATNER'S RAW NERVE
William Shatner interviews "Weird Al" Yankovic... who won't stop stepping on his raw nerve!
MONDAY, DECEMBER 21
8:00 NBC THE SING-OFF
A capella groups compete to see who is the most glee-tarded!
TUESDAY, DECEMBER 22
8:30 FAM WILLY WONKA AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY—Movie
(1971) Forget Johnny Depp and get with the creepiest, funniest Willy Wonka ever, Gene Wilder!
10:00 A&E PARANORMAL STATE
The ghost hunters travel to North Carolina to investigate vulgar outbursts from a three-year-old. (Well, she is from North Carolina.)
WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 23
8:00 ABC HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS
In the Grinch's defense, those Whoville Whos are super annoying.
10:00 A&E STEVEN SEAGAL: LAWMAN
Steven chases two suspects and is faced with a difficult choice: Whose femur does he snap first?