THURSDAY, APRIL 26
8:30 NBC THE OFFICE
Michael has an R-rated freakout after discovering a shipment of paper bears an obscene watermark.
9:00 NBC 30 ROCK
Season Finale! Jack's mother picks out the perfect wedding gift for him and Phoebe: a box of NAG, NAG, NAG.
FRIDAY, APRIL 27
8:00 CBS GHOST WHISPERER
Melinda meets a competing ghost whisperer, and tells her, "This is MY corner, beee-yotch!"
11:00 MTV2 THE ANDY MILONAKIS SHOW
Season Premiere! Rapper Paul Wall presents Andy with a magical grill that allows him to eat anything in his apartment.
SATURDAY, APRIL 28
9:00 FOX AMERICA'S MOST WANTED
Miss America Lauren Nelson helps Walsh and the gang trap sexual predators online. (If you're webcamming, don't forget to take off the tiara!)
SUNDAY, APRIL 29
10:00 HBO ENTOURAGE
Drama is the unlucky victim of Pauly Shore's celebrity prank show. Truly, nothing could be worse.
10:30 COM RENO 911!
In a decision that shocks and confounds the department, the deputies are criticized for their response time.
MONDAY, APRIL 30
9:00 NBC HEROES
Hiro is transported into the distant future, and yet, can't find a single flying skateboard.
9:00 FOX 24
After rescuing Audrey from her captors, Jack unwittingly mistakes post-traumatic stress disorder for "that time of the month."
TUESDAY, MAY 1
8:00 FOX AMERICAN IDOL
This week's musical mentor? BON JOVI! EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!
9:00 CW VERONICA MARS
Veronica helps a Middle Eastern restaurant owner in exchange for free gyros for a year. SMART... GIRL.
WEDNESDAY, MAY 2
8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL
The girls model in Australia—and unless there's a boxing kangaroo involved, I don't give a crap.
10:00 ABC LOST
A newcomer to the island reveals a shocking secret about Flight 815: They served substandard peanuts.