THURSDAY, MAY 11

9:00 WB SMALLVILLE

After watching the season finale at 8 pm, catch this repeat featuring that stinkin' fish stick, Aquaman!

9:00 FOX THAT '70S SHOW

Series Finale! The series finale? I had no idea this show was still on the air!

FRIDAY, MAY 12

8:00 CBS KEITH BARRY: EXTRAORDINARY

Illusions from the magician and his celeb friends. (Hey, if he's not drowning himself in a fishbowl, I'm not interested.)

SATURDAY, MAY 13

8:00 WB FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF—Movie

(1988) Matthew Broderick stars as a narcissist who has a great day at everyone else's expense. Jerk!

8:00 SPIKE OUT OF REACH—Movie

(2004) Steven Seagal leaps into action to rescue his pen pal from white slavers. (Steven Seagal has a pen pal?)

SUNDAY, MAY 14

8:00 CBS SURVIVOR: EXILE ISLAND

Season Finale! Host Jeff Probst tries to act excited about another million-dollar winner.

8:00 NBC THE WEST WING

Series Finale! The very last episode of this Beltway fairy tale. Back to reality, folks!

MONDAY, MAY 15

8:00 FOX PRISON BREAK

Season Finale! The prisoners race for their lives, with Bellick in hot pursuit!

9:00 ABC GREY'S ANATOMY

Season Finale! Doctors pump each other with adrenaline shots to avoid boring each other to death.

TUESDAY, MAY 16

8:00 FOX AMERICAN IDOL

With only three contestants left, Paula fights to stay sober.

10:00 CBS THE UNIT

Season Finale! Don't miss this hilariously macho show starring that guy from the insurance commercials.

WEDNESDAY, MAY 17

8:00 UPN AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL

Season Finale! In order to win, the final two models must compete in an "anorexia challenge."

9:00 ABC LOST

After shooting two of the castaways, Michael pins it on "The Others" (who are really sick of being blamed for everything that goes wrong on the island)!