THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 1

8:00 CW SMALLVILLE

Helen Slater (who played Supergirl in the movie) visits to play Superman's Kryptonian mom. That's just freaky.

9:00 NBC THE OFFICE

Michael has an interoffice freakout when Karen tries to woo Stanley away from Scranton!

FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 2

10:30 COM FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS

It's the hilarious HBO sitcom about a pair of New Zealand musicians—except now it's on Comedy Central!

SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 3

8:00 TBS MEAN GIRLS—Movie

(2004) Tina Fey's hilarious homage to the bitchy teen—starring a pre-rehab Lindsay Lohan!

11:30 NBC SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE

This week hosted by news anchor Brian Williams (somebody remind him to remove the stick from his ass).

SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 4

8:00 CBS AMAZING RACE

Season premiere! Teams race around the globe for cash and glory, insulting every culture along the way!

8:00 FOX THE SIMPSONS

It's "Treehouse of Horror XVIII" in which Homer must kill Kent Brockman, and Ned Flanders scares the kids (which he does anyway, right?).

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 5

9:00 VH1 I LOVE NEW YORK

In this hilarious dating show, the men realize their next challenge is... a blood oath?

9:45 ABC SAMANTHA WHO?

Since amnesiac Sam has no memory of having sex, then that must make her a virgin... right? RIGHT??

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 6

9:00 CW REAPER

Satan offers Sam advice on picking up chicks!

10:00 TBS THE OFFICE

A classic Office repeat in which Dwight incurs brain damage after Michael roasts his foot on a George Foreman Grill.

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 7

8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL

The girls have a "ho down" while acting in a music video!

9:00 FOX KITCHEN NIGHTMARES

Chef Ramsay goes head to head with a chef who's an even bigger a-hole than he is!