9:00 ABC LOST
Season finale! In which I'm 100 percent sure that every single one of your questions will be fully answered.
10:30 COM RENO 911!
The deputies are assigned to train a squad of policeman from Baghdad—but really. What could go wrong?
8:00 ABC 2008 NATIONAL SPELLING
It's the most nail-biting competition on TV, featuring kids who are 30 times smarter than you.
10:00 SCIFI BATTLESTAR GALACTICA
President Roslin is kidnapped by the Cylon hybrid. (How many mpg's do those hybrids get, anyway?
(2008) Commandos must stop an alien race from turning the earth into s'mores. Starring Danica "Winnie from The Wonder Years" McKellar!
8:00 MTV 2008 MTV MOVIE
Mike Myers hosts this annual tribute to cinematic excellence and poop jokes.
9:00 WE BRIDEZILLAS
Season premiere! The world's most psychotic brides are back, and— YOU CALL THAT A FLOWER ARRANGEMENT?!
10:00 ABC THE MOLE
Season premiere! Contestants compete in games of intrigue while one of them tries to eff everything up.
10:00 MTV LEGALLY BLONDE: THE MUSICAL
Debut! For reasons unknown, there's a Legally Blonde musical, and even worse, there's a reality show where they try to cast it.
9:00 FOX HELL'S KITCHEN
In a shocking turn of events, the chefs have trouble making edible food and serving their customers.
10:00 FX 30 DAYS
Season premiere! Indie director Morgan
Spurlock spends 30 days working in a coalmine. (AND only eating food
10:00 SPIKE THE ULTIMATE
This show is like The Real World—if the kids beat the crap out of each other. (In other words, it's better.)
10:00 TVLAND SHE'S GOT THE LOOK
Finally, a beauty contest for the older ladies. Cute MILF alert!