8:00 FOX KITCHEN NIGHTMARES
Season premiere! Chef Ramsay returns to some struggling restaurants just to give them one final kick in the ribs.
10:30 COM REALITY BITES BACK
Season finale! In their last chance to parody as many reality shows as possible, the contestants compete in "American Surv-Idoler's Kitchen."
8:00 FAM SAMURAI GIRL
Debut! A Tokyo girl is sent to San Fran for an arranged marriage, meets deadly ninjas, and kicks their asses. Sounds good to me!
9:00 CBS CBS FALL PREVIEW
The grandpa network introduces their new fall season, including Matlock: The Next Generation.
9:00 BBCA PRIMEVAL
The team's golf game is ruined by an angry pterodactyl. (Oh, if I had a nickel for every time that happened to me.)
10:00 HBO ENTOURAGE
Season premiere! Turns out the reviews for Vince's Medellin aren't so good. (Somebody lock up the gun cabinet.)
10:00 AMC MAD MEN
Don decides a hot new set of wheels is just the thing for his mid-life crisis.
8:00 FOX TERMINATOR: THE SARAH CONNOR CHRONICLES
Season premiere! An exploding jeep (and a killer cyborg) puts a damper on Sarah and John's day.
11:30 HBO LITTLE BRITAIN
Debut! It's the Americanized version of this hilarious sketch comedy import from... well, Britain! Duh!
8:00 ABC WIPEOUT
It's two straight hours of hilarious nut-shots, cerebral hemorrhage, and severed spinal cords.
8:00 CW 90210
The family's bowling night is ruined by the druggie, the cool kid, and the teen whore.
8:00 CW AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL
The hilarious Benny Ninja returns to give the models a how-to on vogue-ing!
9:30 FOX DO NOT DISTURB
Debut! The reputation of a hip New York hotel is threatened when the employees can't stop porking each other.