THURSDAY 12/16

BOOK OF MAPS, BASTA, 76 CHARGER
(Tonic, 3100 NE Sandy) Book of Maps is my favorite local band that I've never seen, but the record is fine, fine work. Every sound they make is assured and cracking with precision. It's a punishing, slightly mathy, slightly metal, slightly screamy, hard prog rock that sounds intelligent to boot. The drummer especially is a confident hitter. As if that isn't enough, they had to go and come up with the cutest names for songs in the world. Example: "Every Time We Play This Song, a Panda Dies in China." 76 Charger is on some metally punk trip that's solid, fun, and almost glammy with raspy "Yeahs!" and Axl-ish falsetto. Rock and roll will not be dead until the day grown men will no longer be able to get away with screeching "motherfucker" in the highest voice they can muster and actually be taken somewhat seriously. Therefore, we should all be appreciative of the sense of security that 76 Charger is helping to provide. MARJORIE SKINNER



CROOKED FINGERS, JOGGERS, BLACK MOUNTAIN ARMY
(Dante's, 1 SW 3rd) If Eric Bachmann was a deck-swabbing pirate on 2003's Red Devil Dawn, his recent material's shape-shifted him into a brave matador, exploring love and valor. Crooked Fingers' latest batch of gorgeous ballads are all hard-grit, whiskey, and gristle, and will come out this spring on Merge. Aside from his consistently gorgeous orchestration and illustrative lyrical stylings, Bachmann's secret weapon this time around is tourmate and Aussie beauty Lara; she's the Kirsty McColl to Bachmann's McGowan on several new breathtaking duets. Bummer that she's on tour with Ben Lee right now--but Bachmann's pared-down sets are always as spectacular and enchanting as when he's armed with a full band. Don't miss him, ever. JOAN HILLER



DR. THEOPOLIS, ROLLIE TUSSING AND THE MARY BETHS, THE BELLA FAYES
(Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside) Only you can decide if you want to spend an evening watching a band who were nominated for the "Best Novelty Song" by the Just Plain Folks Music Organization. Featuring eight members with names like "Bone Dangles," "EZ Money," and "Sneaky Pimpington," as well as a member who only job is to dance around while wearing an Afro wig and sunglasses, Dr. Theopolis might be funny if they were ironic. As it stands, they're just kitsch, and not very good kitsch at that. The mismatched bill also features a set by the Bella Fayes, whose lead singer was compared to the lead singer of Better Than Ezra in one online review. At least the show is free. CORTNEY HARDING



J-BOOGIE'S DUBTRONIC SCIENCE, SOL UPRISING, WALE OYEJIDE, EMANON
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) Like Washington DC's duo Thievery Corporation, Bay Area producer/DJ J.Boogie makes dubs that are at once sexy and political. Dub is at root a political form, not only because it is derived from roots reggae, which is overtly political and religious, but also because it de-centers listening, and shatters all expectations. Dub is a constant revolution; it's always agitated, breaking and falling apart while salvaged phrases, fused fragments of words are desperately launched into black sonic space and exploded like fireworks over a ghost town. The base of J-Boogie's music is this dub, on which he layers smooth hiphop beats, soul vocals, and sexy electronica. Though most of his work is housed by San Francisco's Om label, J.Boogie has appeared on compilations such as the wonderful Deeper Concentration and the even more wonderful Docking Sequence, which was released by Portland's now dead but once busy BSI Records. CHARLES MUDEDE



QUARRY TO THE WAR, SLOWHAWK, MERRICK FOUNDATION
(Ash St, 225 SW Ash) If you've already been introduced to the Forth (a band that manages to be super duper emo screamo and make regular appearances in my home CD player, even though I'm not that into emo), then you'll have to meet their affiliates, Quarry To The War. They've got the same tough love M.O. of hard, anguished guitar and cathartic vocals. And although their name makes them sound as dull as dirt, Merrick Foundation is actually quite good. A guitar/drum duo, their music is remarkably epic and textured for a twosome. It's got a dark, impassioned sludginess to it as well that's definitely worth putting in the extra time in a smoky bar for. MS



YETI SNOWBALL 3 FEATURING DAHOO CHORUS, MARCHFOURTH, GAIA TRIBE MUSIC, DJ MICHELE BASS
(Bossanova, 722 E Burnside) I have a sneaky suspicion that this Yeti Snowball might have a tinge of the Burning Man vibe, but it's Christmas so I'm not going to hate on anybody. Featured guests include the brass explosions of the Marchfourth Marching Band, the Dahoo Chorus experimental rock opera and choir, the Gaia Tribe Music DJ/live drum combo, DJ Tree who mixes electro and tribal beats, and special guests the Roswell Sisters. You are encouraged to dress in festive fun or formal attire. OhhhÉ maybe that silk jumper my mom sent me will finally come in handy. KS



FRIDAY 12/17

BISHOPS ROCK AND ROLL HAIR FASHION SHOW FEATURING THE MAKERS, THE PUNK GROUP, DJ EVIL-1, DJ SNEAKERS, DJ KITMAN, DJ MOIST
(Roseland, 8 NW 6th) See Destination Fun, Pg 14



BLANKET MUSIC, RECLINERLAND, RELAY
(Nocturnal, 1800 E Burnside) Hush Records label impresario Chad Crouch celebrates the release of Cultural Norms, the latest full-length by his own overtly tranquil outfit Blanket Music. Following in the down-stuffed tradition of Blanket Music's previous releases, Cultural Norms has an enveloping stillness that's difficult to penetrate. The record purports to explore the "contemporary hot topics" from simple perspectives within American society, but does so with a patience that makes the internal narratives almost opaque. Still, the band seems to have found it's footing remarkably well in Norms, their finest release to date, and a welcome addition to the Hush Records swelling discography. ZAC PENNINGTON



CRITTERS BUGGIN, THRUSTER!
(Doug Fir Lounge, 830 E Burnside) Led by dynamic guitarist Tim Young (Zony Mash, Wayne Horvitz, and loads more), Thruster! earn their exclamation mark with the sort of jazz rock that stiffens the arms hairs of NYC avant-garde venue Tonic patrons. The trio (including drummer Matt Chamberlain and bassist Kaveh Rastegar) alternates between Red-era King Crimson's thorny, brainy convolutions, Hendrix's well-articulated bombast, and Calexico's blasted, beatific prairie meditations. I've told you many times already about the abundantly diverse pleasures of Critters Buggin, but if you've never caught these Seattle shapeshifters, you need to lose your CB virginity pronto. You never know what they're gonna lay on your noggin, but you can bet it'll leave you cockeyed and intoxicated. DAVE SEGAL



DEADMANDISCO
(Tonic, 3100 NE Sandy) Deadmandisco, the quintessential Davey Jones' Locker mishmash of '80s and modern stylings, rock some indie-inspired DC core and do it pretty well considering the band's short history. Their sound meanders yet it would not be way off the mark to compare them to Fugazi, circa 1988. Their sound builds momentum when the boys' vocals are layered and the thrashing speeds up, drawing on the machismo passion and sincerity of a losing Lacrosse team. JENNA ROADMAN



EL VEZ, BART DAVENPORT, THE HUMAN HANDS
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) Bart Davenport is fiiiiiiiiiine. I mean like buggy eyes and floppy hair-fine. From the same Bay Area grab bag as likeminded buddies Call and Response and Rogue Wave, BD's Rubber Soul-ish blues pop is jangly; buttery. A 2002 tour with Kings of Convenience helped him along, but he deserves way more visibility than his current label, Antenna Farm, can give him. When you go to the 'Pan, make sure and snatch a copy of Maroon Cocoon, his newest--it's a cheeky mishmash of psychy bossa nova beats and has reeds and 808, which always and never go together. JOAN HILLER



INFLIKT, SYX, FIVEFOOTTHICK
(Ash Street, 225 SW Ash) Like many metal bands looking to get the maximum brutality out of their hard consonant sounds, Inflikt has changed a "c" to a "k." Makes sense. C is for cuddlers, k is for killers; c looks like a wanna-be circle, k resembles a sharpened death trident. Spelling similarities aside, Inflikt isn't playing follow the leader with Korn. Its strategically staggered riffs, deceptively catchy choruses and mid-werewolf-transition roars recall Pantera at its most vulgarly powerful. Inflikt recently shared a stage with Dimebag Darrell Abbott's band Damageplan, and its uniformly goateed members will have the fallen guitar god in mind at this show, ensuring a far-beyond-driven performance. ANDREW MILLER



DOLLY PARTON
(Rose Garden, TK) See Music, Pg 21



SHOEGAZER'S BALL III FEATURING THE HIGH VIOLETS, UPSIDEDOWN, CLIMBER, TELEPHONE, MORE
(Bossanova, 722 E Burnside) See My, What a Busy Week! Pg 19



SIR MIX-A-LOT
(Barracuda, 9 NW 2nd) The shadow of Sir Mix-a-Lot hangs heavy over the national impression of Northwest hiphop--a vision of our national corner that is obscured by the shape of a 20-foot prop ass. Whether one novelty hit from the early '90s is enough to taint an entire region is debatable--but it's more or less inarguable that it's all but crippled Mix's career. Not to say that the man hasn't kept up trying (and still probably makes a good deal of money playing shows to 30-something white suburbanites), but can you imagine how hard it must be to shoulder the weight of that giant prosthesis? ZP



SNUGGLE-UPS, EUROMOTION, STRATEGY, DJ BEYONDA
(Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison) See My, What a Busy Week! Pg 19



SATURDAY 12/18

DANAVA, HUSTLER WHITE, CIRCLES INTO LINES
(Wire Forest, 1404 SE 10th) Although I had always been fond of the name "Walk Walk Pink," which captures a little bit of the psychedelia that is this band, I got to admit that Danava is a pretty cool name change. For those of you who are a little rusty on your Sanskrit, it means "demon," "evil-minded ogre," or "subhuman monster." Not bad for a band whose assault of disorienting retro, experimental psyche literally scares people away. It's a shame to watch them flit from house show to bowling alley to house show, because their sound is muddy enough without a shitty PA. Regardless, they are one of the few bands in town that can't be listened to passively, so if you think you're becoming too apathetic get thee to the basement. And leave your stubborn alliance to linear thought at home. MS



LOVE VIGILANTES, BLACK CELEBRATION, BROTHER WOLF, THE XPLODING BOYS
(Roseland, 8 NW 6th) An admirable amassment of bands paying tribute to bleak British mopers, the Roseland hosts cover bands Black Celebration (Depeche Mode), Brother Wolf (The Cult), The Xploding Boys (the Cure), and Love Vigilantes (New Order). And while I'd certainly rather see this line-up than, say, a bunch of miming metal midgets or whatever, I got to admit a touch of suspicion at the notion of covering the relatively mechanical discographies of the '80s. Alright, sure--the Cult has a few solos, and Robert Smith was known to pud pull now and again, but seriously: how fucking hard could it be to be in a New Order cover band? Have you ever listened to New Order? That shit is CAKE. I mean, I love "Age Of Consent" as much as the next guy, but come on. ZP



THE SHORE, THE DAMNWELLS, WESTERN AERIAL
(Dante's, 1 SW 3rd) See Music, Pg 21



SIREN'S ECHO
(Ash Street, 225 SW Ash) It's always exciting when a local hiphop artist releases an album because it doesn't happen nearly as often as it should. And what happens even less is when local female hiphop artists release an album, and when it's as confident, catchy, and clever as Sirens Echo's new Psalms of the Sirens. Siren's Echo is Syndel and Toni Hill, two ladies from the Oldominion crew who, as evidenced by the new CD, are ready to move on into their own world, should they be so inclined. Whether rocking out on the supremely catchy, guitar-driven party track "Keep It Movin'," or slowing things down for the beautifully-chorused "Perfect Peace," or getting all jazzy on the saxaphone-fueled "Hands Together, Siren's Echo shows an impressive mastery over different musical styles, their gorgeous melody hooks very nearly upstaging their solid rapping skills. JUSTIN WESCOAT SANDERS



STATCH AND THE RAPES, NO HEROES, VIRUS NINE, THE CULPRITS, OFFENCE
(Davey Jones' Locker, 5925 SE Foster) Dear Statch: Yes, I called your band name "idiotic" in a recent U&C. Yes, I think using rape to be funny or "hardcore" is wrong. No, I didn't wanna start beef; I was simply calling you out for being (maybe unknowingly?) misogynistic. BUT when you emailed and said punk wasn't PC, and that I was just feeling guilty because I'd drunkenly statutorily raped a way underage lady in my past, you went too far. Pistols at dawn? Fisticuffs? Drinking contest? You decide. I haven't declared war on a band in months--not even a damn POLICE ACTION--but you want war, you got war! ADAM GNADE



SUNDAY 12/19

TERRY RILEY
(Community Music Center, 3350 SE Foster) See Music, Pg 23



MONDAY 12/20

MY WAY MY LOVE, KIESKAGATO, CLIMBER
(Holocene, 1001 SE Morrison) Formerly Rm. 101, Kieskagato are a Radiohead influenced band, who recently have added hints of Latin and jazz to their music, probably to avoid the dreaded characterization "Radiohead ripoff band." Then again, those Latin and jazz influences don't make much of a difference--the singer is still a Thom Yorke wannabee. On the bright side, though, the show's got a lot of Radiohead for only a couple bucks. KS



TUESDAY 12/21

MY WAY MY LOVE, RELAY, KIESKAGATO
(Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd) See My, What a Busy Week! Pg 15



WEDNESDAY 12/22

ETHER GLOW
(Ash Street, 225 SW Ash) The relative regard in which critics and hipsters hold jazz and jam music illustrates the circular nature of the snobbery spectrum. In terms of crass characterization, jazz is high art, and jam music is a slacker soundtrack for addled audiences. Realistically, there is an extremely thin line between these worlds, both of which stem from the uncompromising embrace of instrumental freedom. Ether Glow straddles this boundary. Its members are all trained jazz masters, but they cloak their spidery soloist skills in epic-scale rock compositions. The talented trio recently moved from Colorado to the Pacific Northwest, where it is much more likely to inspire a loving tribute to the tune of "Evenflow." AM



GOSLING
(Berbati's Pan, 10 SW 3rd) I have a co-worker who is pushing 30 but still becomes enamored with boy-fronted, guitar-rocking bands with a zeal and single-mindedness to rival any junior high school girl's. At the absolute peak of his infatuations of the last couple of years is Gosling, formerly Loudermilk before some major label skullduggery forced the band to redub themselves. Gosling's Muse-ish pomp and raffish, NME-baiting good looks are formidable in the tightness of their execution and perfectly designed to ensnare the googly fandom of indie-boy-lovers young and old. SAM MICKENS



WE'RE FROM JAPAN, ON VIBRATO
(Tonic Lounge, 3100 NE Sandy Blvd) No they're not, they're from Portland and we should be damn proud. They produce a pristine and straightforward coaction of "it's gonna be all right" instrumental buildups and Howe Gelb-ish guitar strumming and crooning. Free from strict adherence to any discernible rock trends or "scene," they skip from twinkly atmospheric instrumentals to modest campfire country without a blink. Unquestionably, they are brightest when they fuse the two. They'll have you forgetting about the 16 missed calls from your heroin addict sister by the third song. JENNA ROADMAN