Why I Should be the King of P-Town 

I will end poverty and teach illiterate children to fly oh. Sorry. That's from my "Why I should be President" speech.

What I will bring to the job is 1) Ending all playing of bad techno. 2) The Three Kings of Boogers will no longer be frowned upon (picking, flicking, and licking). 3) And I will offer an automotive course to all who believe that putting rims on your car will repair it. I KNOW THE PEOPLE.



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