Why are these 2,008 drummers from the Olympics opening ceremony smiling? Because they want us to know that they have absolutely no intention of using their awe-inspiring ability to work together to invade our country and enslave our lazy asses throughout eternity. (Gulp.) Thanks guys!


Hey, look everybody! It's the oldest member of the Chinese gymnastics squad.


President Bush to world: "Huh-huh-huh. Me like beach volleyball. Huh-huh-huh."