FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST, DON'T FORGET! Join the Mercury and the rest of Portland's brightest and drunkest for a night of fun and nail-biting at the Mercury Election Night Party at the Doug Fir from 6 pm to midnight!

We'll be watching returns on the big screen downstairs, in the bar, and on the smoking patio! Plus former senatorial candidate and super smarty pants STEVE NOVICK will be on hand to explain the complicated stuff, and talk us off the ledge if things get hairy. Then mayor-to-be SAM ADAMS will be dropping by to voice political words of encouragement, and DJ GREGARIOUS and DJ FLIGHTRISK will be working the turntables to your immense enjoyment.

BUT EVEN BETTER? We'll have games, like "Bash the Bush Pinata," photo taking opportunities with your favorite and most loathed politicians (her initials are S.P.), and the nearly nude gals from LILLE BOUTIQUE will be there to notify us of any major electoral shifts -- in their sexy underpants. We'll even have a BUSH BITCH BOX where you'll get to tell the outgoing president exactly how you feel... on video! And? FREE HATS! Oooooooh.

Seriously, folks. This is going to be a goddamn hoot -- so join us for the hugs, the tears, and (more than likely) the drunken hook-ups of the most important election of our generation!!

BTW, voted yet?