This week in the Mercury's exhilarating Film section, you will find:

• Matt Davis reviewing The Soloist! At no point at all does he identify with Robert Downey Jr.!

• Alison Hallett getting bored by cute things in Earth! This is possibly a sign of the apocalypse!

• Ned Lannamann fawning over Zooey Deschanel in Gigantic before calling on his prodigious musical knowledge to discuss Anvil! The Story of Anvil!

• Also! Bret Easton Ellis gets adapted again in The Informers, blah blah blah something about French people, and I don't like Caprica very much.

So okay, this Caprica business is what I really want to talk about. Regular Blogtown denizens will know that my love for Battlestar Galactica is so strong that not even a restraining order kept me from frantically dry-humping Edward James Olmos' leg that one time I saw him at Subway. But over the past few days, I've actually been thinking that my not-so-kind review of Caprica was, in fact, too kind. In particular, I keep flashing back to one image in the pilot that kind of makes me hate life. I won't say what it is, 'cause it's a pretty big spoiler, but gyah. I'd characterize it as a shark-jumping moment, but I don't even think that term applies, really, if said moment occurs 80 minutes into a 90-minute pilot. That's not jumping the shark, that's crashing the motorcycle before you even get to the ramp next to the shark pit. (Sharks live in pits, right? What? Like I'm a scientist.)

HOWEVER: A few people I know and respect (hi Kiala!) really loved Caprica, and it's getting really good reviews (here, here, and here), so I'm suspecting that I might be totally off-base on this one. So if you've seen Caprica, lemme know what you thought in the comments. I'm curious to hear peoples' reactions on this one, and I'm curious to see if my reactions to the pilot are really that far off the mark. Also, we're now at that part of the blog post where I'm supposed to come up with something clever and witty to say as a conclusion, but screw it. It's 5:40 pm on a Friday and I'm all hopped up on sugar and I have important stuff to do at home, people. This E.J.O. fanfic isn't going to finish itself.