Today's alarming press release from the police: over night, someone broke into a police car and stole a Glock 17, ammo, Taser and police vest:

This incident occurred overnight and the officer discovered the theft in the morning. The equipment was stored in a locked container that was secured to the vehicle. The suspect or suspects dismantled the car alarm, forced their way into the vehicle and then broke open the locked container. The officer immediately notified the police bureau and a report was filed. This is an ongoing investigation.

So, uh, be on the alert for someone wandering around with police weapons and a police vest who is not, in fact, a police officer. This is the sort of thing that would be hilarious if it turns out the thief is Steve Urkel and not funny at all if it turns out to be, you know, some meth head who beats his wife.