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The Double Down, KFC’s new bacon “sandwich” on fried chicken “bread”, hits the market next Monday. Frankly, I feel it’s about time a national corporation has taken on overpopulation by offering its costumers a fast track to heart disease and death. Good on ya’ KFC! But outside of the hordes of self-destructive hicks and (lord save me) self-loathing food writers likely to line up for this abomination, there is one group that would not have the chance experience this kind of abusive eating: vegans.

Well, vegans, now you can join in the fun.

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Just as monstrous, but not as “chicken apocalypse-y,” it’s the Vegan Double Down from San Francisco blog Vegansaurus. They’ve put together step-by-step instructions to make your own, most notable for the recipe for a vegan Colonel’s Sauce, and a spice mix said to adequately capture the blend of KFC’s “11 Secret Herbs and Spices.”

To be clear, neither of these “sandwich” options are good for you.

I have yet to decide if I’m going to take a Double Down bullet for the blog (I’ll most likely leave it up to a poll later this week), but I might consider eating a vegan version if some enterprising reader wants to make one for me. Man, the things I do for you…