BPGATE!! An oil spill contract worker for BP dies of a gunshot wound: likely suicide. Another worker was killed in what Adm. Thad Allen called "a swimming incident."

ALGATE!! The Oregonian staked out the 54-year-old massage therapist (see below) at her Southeast Portland home; she refused to talk. Was wearing a "large, floppy hat." Let me guess: big sunglasses too?

MCCHRYSTALGATE!! He's out; Centcom commander Petraeus is in.

GATESGATE!! The Defense Secretary says McChrystal should have stayed on.

TERRORGATE!! Two American Muslims go to Pakistani prison on terror charges.

IRANGATE!! They're enriching more uranium, in defiance of UN warnings.

NORTHKOREAGATE!! The totalitarian regime is grooming Kim Jong Il's son to take over; "releasing songs and poems" in his honor. This is what happens when your only allowable culture involves worshipping boring, feeble men in khaki.

RUDDGATE!! Australian PM: Fired!

KAGANGATE!! Republicans are opposing Elena Kagan's nomination like it's their job.

POLLUTIONGATE!! Oil companies convince California to put emissions law up for a vote in November.

SCHOOLGATE!! Carole Smith proposes to slash PPS budgets by 10 percent, eliminate 126 full-time equivalent teaching jobs. Ouch.