Aside from being incredibly smart, and an all around mountain of a man, Roger Ebert has proven that you, who do not cook, are simply lazy asshats.

After surgery to fight cancer in his thyroid and salivary gland, Ebert was no longer able to eat, taking his nourishment instead from a feeding tube. However, that has not stopped him from cooking. In fact, he will be releasing a cookbook called "The Pot and How to Use It. The Mystery and Romance of the Rice Cooker," in September.

“So what?” you ask. “It’s a cookbook about stupid rice cookers.” Yes. And it contains recipes for everything from chili to jambalaya to oatmeal. From a recent AP article:

Ebert fell in love with the rice cooker after receiving one as a present for his 1992 wedding. The Chicago Sun-Times critic says he even took the rice cooker with him to the Sundance Film Festival, where he would cook with it during his busy movie-viewing schedule.

"We used to take the rice cooker almost everywhere we went," his wife, Chaz Ebert, said.

Ebert urges his readers to improvise with the recipes and ingredients, saying there are no rules. He also says it is easy to adapt recipes not written for the rice cooker. Someone could go a week using the rice cooker three meals a day, he said.

So don’t let me hear you whining about not be able to cook, you pansy. Ebert can do it, and he can’t even eat. Shut up and go make some rice.