Okay, so by now everybody knows that Steven Seagal wants the poonani, right? WAIT. You didn't get the company-wide email that clearly stated Steven Seagal wants the poonani? Well, consider yourself informed, because Steven Seagal—the star of Above the Law, martial arts master, and the subject of the Mercury's Steven Seagal Issue—totally wants the poonani. As further proof, here is Steven's AH-MAY-ZING reggae song—wait, process that— REGGAE song called "Strut," in which he not only definitively states he wants the "poonani" but also reminds us that "her dress is just as pretty, they're not just to cover her kitty." HOLY... SHIT.

Hat tips to BWE!