... and I don't have a punchline. I just wanted to talk about three different comics-y things, but I'm too lazy to write three separate posts! So here:

FIRST. Turns out Emma Stone isn't Mary Jane Watson after all, but instead is Gwen Stacy. Yes, this defies logic, but I will allow it. On the upspide, yay, Emma Stone! Ont he downside... SWIK! SNAP.

SECOND. Looks like kickass director Darren Aronofsky—The Wrestler, Pi, The Fountain, Requiem for a Dreammight direct the sequel to the decidedly un-kickass X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Utilizing my vast creative prowess, I have created a half-assed composite image of what I expect/hope the final film will look like. In related news, I have too much time on my hands.

THIRD. Image Comics' The Walking Dead was the first major title to do be available day-and-date in comics shops and digitally; now Marvel has launched their first book that's simultaneously available in both formats. It's Ultimate Comics Thor, coming from the impressive creative team of writer Jonathan Hickman (The Nightly News) and artist Carlos Pacheco; it'll run you $3.99 whether you get it up in a brick-and-mortar store on via the Marvel Comics app for the iPhone and/or iPad. Expect debates about pricing to follow shortly, plus plenty of hand-wringing about the demise of comics shops.