There's a good chance I'm going to die from Morton's Neuroma, guys. I'm not joking! The main cause of it is high heeled shoes, and at 5'1" I'm not going to stop wearing them anytime soon. In fact, as I age, and begin to shrink, I plan to wear them higher and higher to compensate. However, even I have limits, and this roundup of The 20 Most Painful Shoes Ever Created contains a few pairs that nobody should ever, ever wear (plus a couple that don't belong on the list like the Balenciaga "LEGO" heels (want 'em), Christian Dior platforms (looks comfy to me), and the Pokeman platforms and hideous "real feet," which are probably perfectly comfortable but ridiculous, and vomit-inducing, respectively). Such as:

AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!

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which can lead to NOOOOOOOOOO!

Support The Portland Mercury

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Hit the break for a couple more doozies.

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