What, you're still mad about that? Police have discovered a "Mumbai-style plot" to blow up Danish newspapers who printed a so-called offensive cartoon of the Prophet Mohammed back in 2005.
Airports in NYC are finally returning to some semblance of normalcy. However the same cannot be said for Atlanta who is currently holding our own Ned Lannamann hostage. OR SO HE SAYS.
A 50 mile per hour gust is being blamed for yesterday's ski lift collapse in Maine. JERK.
Two men are still trapped in a Detroit building that exploded thanks to a leaky gas line. JERK. (The leaky gas line, not the men or the building.)
A snoopy husband hacks into cheating wife's email to catch her cheating; Cheating wife charges snoopy hubby with a felony.
Police are looking for a Pennsylvania man who allegedly stole a hand-held video game—from a dead teen in a casket. You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch!
Angry grampy smacks sullen teen on plane for refusing to shut off his iPhone. GO BACK TO SUCKING YOUR WERTHERS, OLD MAN!!
In other hillbilly news: A South Carolina man is injured while playing a real life game of "Frogger" on the highway.
Locally, there was a police involved shooting involving a man carrying a machete, who was beanbagged, tazed and riddled with bullets after only 56 seconds of contact with the cops. (For those keeping score at home, that makes the sixth mentally ill person shot by police in 2010.)
Now here's what's going on in your neck of the woods: Chilly, dry and mostly sunny until further notice.
And finally, stop building snow penises you guys! IT'S AGAINST THE LAW. (And upsetting to those of us with small penises.)