Tears shed by women contain chemical signals that decrease sexual arousal and testosterone levels in men, according to a study.

Researchers collected the tears—!!!!!!!—from women watching sad movies and then had straight men—beastly straight men—smell their tears. Contrary to what freshmen in woman's studies programs are taught, straight men are not aroused by women's tears. Quite the opposite: men who smelled women's tears and not saline (for the control group) "judged pictures of women's faces to be less sexually attractive," self-reported lower levels of general horniness, and "showed lower activation in brain regions implicated in sexual arousal." So remove those weepies from your Netflix queue, ladies, if you wanna get laid on movie nights.