First, here's the new Britney Spears video for her song, "Hold it Against Me" and this much we know:
1) Britney actually came here with her entrourage of skanky barely clad gay dudes from another planet after hitching a ride on a meteor. I DID NOT KNOW THAT!
2) During her time away, Britney grew approximately 17 inches, and invented the "Flying Wedding Dress."
3) Brit's tech room is a goddamn mess. She should hire one of those helper geeks from Best Buy to come over and help her straighten it up.
4) Oh, and there's a "good" Britney and a "bad" Britney who both have such wicked karate skillz, they are unable to defeat each other on the field of battle. (Though I bet neither of them could beat Bald-wielding-a-golf-umbrella Britney.)
5) The song's kinda so-so, but that karate fight is pretty awesome. For those pressed for time today, hop right to the 2:38 mark.
Secondly, here's the new video from Garfunkle & Oates entitled, "This Party Took a Turn for the Douche," and this is what we know:
1) I love these gals.