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YOU READ CORRECTLY MY FRIENDS! The world's most brilliant scientific minds have finally succeeding in creating a Justin Bieber toothbrush—which means I can finally put Justin in my mouth! (I knew you were going to make that joke in the comments, so I beat ya to it! HA! HA! HA! REVERSE BURN!)

In fact, Brush Buddies have come out with a whole line of dental products erotically called, "Justin Bieber Oral Care" that includes the following:

Justin Bieber Adult and Kid-sized Toothbrushes. These are not so awesome because they don't do anything except have his face on the handle—which you can't see anyway while you're brushing your teeth, right? So what's the fucking point? They should have tiny reproductions of his head on each bristle. WORK ON THAT SHIT, BRUSH BUDDIES!
The Justin Bieber Singing Toothbrush! Now we're talking!! These Bieber-embossed tools play two of Das Beebs greatest hits for two dentist-recommended minutes while you brush away a day's worth of encrusted filth, sticky fluids, and swarming bacteria from your molars.
• And… wait just a fucking second... JUSTIN BIEBER TOOTH FLOSS??? Oh, sweet Jesus—it's like a beautiful dream! 55 yards of delicious minty waxed floss, personally approved by the greatest pop artist of this (or any other) century!
• They even have a Justin Bieber Oral Care Travel Kit that contains a Bieber brush, a two minute hourglass timer (!!), Bieber floss (!!!), AND a Justin Bieber tongue scraper (!!!!!!!!!)—though why anyone would want to remove the taste of Bieber from their mouth is beyond me. (Goddammit. I just insulted myself, didn't I? REVERSE REVERSE BURN!!)

Whatever... ME WANTEE!!