Cat people! Holy shit and look out: A cat in our state has been diagnosed with the Bubonic Plague!! Should you need a refresher: "The plague used to be known as The Black Death. It traveled through Europe during the 13-hundreds and killed an estimated 50 percent of the population." Yes, that's the one. And yes it is ironic that it should afflict a member of the species that would have saved a bunch of 14th Century asses from said plague had they not been wrongly accused of being cohorts of Satan. (Satan!) However, according to the Oregon Veterinary Medical Association's official press release, "Plague cases are rare in Oregon and flea treatment for household pets can help prevent plague. Plague is spread to humans through a bite from infected fleas. People can protect themselves, their family members and their pets," said Emilio DeBess, D.V.M., M.P.V.M., Oregon Public Health Division state public health veterinarian. 'Using flea treatment on your pets is very important, because your pets can bring fleas into your home. Plague is serious, but it is treatable with antibiotics if caught early.'" So re-up on the Frontline.

• Whatever that dude in back is doing, I don't think it's a service offered at Dove Lewis.